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Ariana Grande is performing a cosmically mindbending concert in Fortnite. No

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thanks. I'll take some tech news. Good choice. Apple has caused a stir among

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tech and privacy enthusiasts by announcing plans to scan the company's

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devices for content that depicts the abuse of children. Apple published a

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press release and a technical breakdown of how this would work, which involves

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using ondevice machine learning to detect images that match a known

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database of image hashes. If a certain threshold of matches is reached, Apple

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will provide information to the authorities. Now, obviously, this is a

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noble goal, two thumbs up. But the implementation has privacy advocates

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worried that a similar system could easily be used to scan for any number of

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things. The Electronic Frontier Foundation calls it a backdoor into your

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private life, while others are pointing out that such a move is a bit strange

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coming from Apple, who is never going to live down that CES billboard about

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things staying on your iPhone. The system won't be implemented until later

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this year, so there's a bit more time to argue about hypothetical situations and

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reference George Orwell a lot. But there's even more Apple news

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thanks to a number of documents relating to their legal fight with Epic Games

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being released this week. One of the more juicy ones actually concerns

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Google, who apparently called Epic's plans to sidestep the Play Store a

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contagion because it threatened Google's dominant app platform. The court filings

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also revealed that Google called the Android sideloading process abysmal and

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contemplated buying a majority stake in Epic to stop their lawsuit because when

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you're rich, they let you do it. Another document lays out Apple's anti-Epic

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argument in detail, essentially saying that they're only after money since Epic

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has admitted at times that current antitrust law may not be on their side.

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In the midst of all of this though, developers complained to Apple this week

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about scam apps that were promoted in the Australian iOS app store. One app

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was charging $13 a week to remove ads, which goes against Apple's promise of

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rejecting expensive apps that try to cheat users with irrationally high

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prices, leading once more to the question of whether Apple can decide

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what is irrational. Like, is Apple's

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irrational hatred of me irrational? I

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just I just want to tell Tim how much he means to me face to face. I think he

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loves you. And here's a scam you should watch out for. A digital storefront

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called Quest has been swindling desperate GPU buyers out of their

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hard-earned money. A mega thread on the graphics card subreddit is full of

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thousands of comments from wouldbe customers whose orders were never

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fulfilled. At some point, Quest changed their website to a new domain. And while

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it's lacking quite a bit of detail, like for example, it has an empty about

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section. Who are you? It otherwise looks legit enough to trick others. So, we

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would advise avoiding these guys. Uh even if you see a must buy price on a

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graphics card, this is this is a side quest you definitely want to skip. Aha.

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Now, it's time for some mainline bits that doesn't work anymore. Scammers are

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everywhere right now. Apparently, Vice just published a report on multiple

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services that will let users pay to ban

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other users, which is accomplished by creating copycat accounts, impersonating

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the target, then reporting the original user for impersonation. Feel like it

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shouldn't work. This will cost you just $60. You know, I missed the old internet

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where we just argued about whether it was called GIF or that other word that's

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not real and doesn't exist. Lukewarm leaker Front Page Tech claims to have

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inside information that Google will launch the 5G capable Pixel 5A on August

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26th for $450. It seems a bit strange to launch

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it so long after the Pixel 5 and so close to the Pixel 6 launch this fall,

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but hey, it's a wild time protect products. I mean, Valve is launching a

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handheld Steam machine, so far as I can tell, anything goes. I handheld the

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first one. Microsoft has announced it is developing an experimental mode for the

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Edge browser called super duper secure mode. Did Elon Musk name it? It will

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apparently slightly increase security while having a minimal impact on

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performance. Rumors say they're already working on the second revision of the

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system called Mega Ultra Omni Security Bonanza Time, which I personally think

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is a much catchier name. Free. And hey, remember that 3dfx Twitter account that

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said the company is coming back? Yeah, it turns out all they posted was an

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amateur-looking slideshow with some vague promises before the account itself

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was deleted. So, it was all a sham. But,

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were we wrong to hope? Really, to look on the horizon for some dim chance of a

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brighter tomorrow? Yes, we were. That was stupid. And Disney has revealed the

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pricing for its Star Wars Galactic Star Cruiser attraction. Two nights for two

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guests in one cabin will cost almost $5,000.

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But hey, you'd be pretending to sleep and hang out on a spaceship, which would

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sound super cool if it didn't take place in the sequel era. It's not canon. If

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you want a sequel to this episode, you'll have to come back on Monday for

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Oh, I fell off my box. For more tech news, we have a plan. We're not just

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making these up one at a time as we go. Or we're totally pulling a Kevin Feige

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here. Yeah, they're already written. I swear it.