ah yes see there is tech news today how did i know that how did i know that i'm
slicker than snake baby whoa NVIDIA has been a very bad giant tech
corporation lately so the u.s security and exchange commission has just fined
it for failing to disclose how big of an impact cryptocurrency mining had on its
revenue growth in 2018. in investor communications NVIDIA made it sound like
miners buying up stock of gpus didn't really contribute to a profit increase
in its gaming business when in actuality
crypto miners we're a big part of that and you know what i don't even need
these because they actually make that blurrier they're for that's for computer
use oh it really had an impact though lying
that's pretty bad the fine must be pretty big it must be
yeah no it's 5.5 million dollars a veritable slap on the wrist for a
company that made 7.6 billion in just the last quarter of 2021 alone
the sec has ordered NVIDIA to stop withholding information from investors
which i'm sure will work this is a society just tell them to stop
and bam it's not like it works in europe or
anything almost two years after suing apple and
getting fortnite kicked off iOS epic games has finally made a deal to bring
it back for everyone sort of there's always a sword fortnite is now free to
play through xbox cloud gaming meaning it doesn't matter whether you're on
Android Windows or an iphone or ipad you can open a browser and buy v-bucks to
your heart's content or your parents wallets connect whatever NVIDIA has had
an iOS compatible version of fortnite available through a limited time closed
beta on GeForce now but this solution only requires you to have a microsoft
account to play epic ceo tim sweeney what a sweetheart originally didn't want
fortnite on x-club but he's apparently had a change of heart but you can still
go against his wishes to keep fortnite off steam deck by playing it through the
microsoft edge beta feels good to stick it to the man hey
sweetie society who needs it anarchy
just meet you in the wild backwards hat and apple google and microsoft have
joined forces to kill all passwords using a giant password guillotine
actually on the moon no the last letter it's gone
the three tech giants just announced a partnership with the fido alliance f fi
yeah yep vital alliance which stands for fast identity online apparently what's
the d id okay fast id okay i get it apparently to push forward
a secure sign in method called pass key basically any website or app you want to
sign in to would simply push a request to your phone then you just unlock and
authenticate with a pin or a fingerprint or something so basically it's like
two-factor authentication but getting rid of the one factor that sucks because
yeah you might be a creative genius at making unique passwords but that's a bit
like saying you're the best at shaping your mashed potatoes into a perfect well
to pour the gravy in like good job i can't do that you can't do
that not what i'm eating with two knives now it's time for the quick bits brought
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techlinked quick quick bits this one is just quick bits it's just
like grandma made them remember when they fired ceo of arms china division
allen wu went rogue stole the company's seal and refused to leave the office
that's what i did he lives here now he doesn't shower well despite ARM
china's board voting him out last week and ARM announcing that the issue was
resolved now the company's employees have rallied
behind him writing a letter in support of wu this is like trump who has again
refused to step down a corporate mutiny in the year of our lord 2022 i guess
it's time to resolve this with the only method that's sure to work a duel allen
wu versus the softbank robot live stream meta has shown off impressive tech demos
of nearly photorealistic vr avatars in the past but the company's actual
playable avatars basically look like nintendo me's
shots fired speak for yourself riley but that might change thanks to a new
processor developed by meta for the sole purpose of rendering those fancier
avatars in vr i think we can take this to the next level we need chips for
rendering every specific thing in every video game ever and then we'll all be
lining up at best buy to get the processing unit for food yeah people
will use them for food that's the thing chip shortage is famine
rumors are pointing towards AMD's next gen rx 7900 xt graphics card as the
first consumer GPU with support for pci gen 5 a standard that doubles the bend
with a pci gen 4 and which will be supported by AMD's upcoming am5
compatible motherboards and cpus all three components are expected to launch
by the end of 2022 so prepare yourselves and pep your angus for a new tech that
could perform significantly better than current models that's not always a given
these i can't i'm sorry and neither is that launch date we'll see yeah oh my god
look it's a swarm of drones that can track a person through a dense bamboo
forest without human guidance great made by scientists from china's
angry i'm definitely saying that bad at chinese words sorry andy's laughing at
me
university the drones can communicate with each other which allows them to break formation to avoid obstacles and
then reconstitute themselves sometimes in the form of a face like at the end of
the matrix 3 possibly into a deadly megazord of some sort the last part we
kind of just added researchers say that the drones could be useful for disaster
relief or disaster creation
no they actually said that and ecological surveys uh it's hilarious
and in case you thought fuel-less electric vehicles were the only way
forward a south african mining company called anglo-american whew
on the list of cancelled company names has just
deployed the world's largest truck powered by a hydrogen fuel cell engine
specifically a two megawatt unit built by seattle company first mode so they
can make the environment a little better while gouging materials out of the
ground given you take you know that's life we like buying stuff and we all
knew this was coming but the tech news is gone but you cannot be gone on monday
we'll be back will you