I can't get enough of that tech news.
You can never get enough.
[laughter] I'm sorry, that was too much. Microsoft
is reportedly scaling back its internal sales growth targets for some of its
newer AI tools after slower than expected adoption by customers.
According to internal sources who spoke with the information, multiple Azure
sales teams missed aggressive quotas last fiscal year according to this
report. A rare outcome at Microsoft, prompting the company to quietly relax
growth expectations for certain AI products as enterprise customers pushed
back on paying for agents whose returns
they said were hard to measure. Not sure
what they're going to get you, but the vibes. Oh, I mean, how? However, after a
few outlets picked up the story, Microsoft told Futurism that the initial
reports inaccurately combine growth and
sales quotas, insisting that AI sales
targets were never lowered, even as internal adjustments suggest
expectations are being reset behind the scenes. So, maybe tons of people love
paying for Co-Pilot. And for everyone who doesn't, great news. The newest
update for LG TVs bakes co-pilot
directly into the home screen. And while it can be hidden, there's no option to
uninstall because nothing complements your movie
watching experience like another button you'll never click on. It's no wonder
people are building custom tools that get rid of all the AI features in
Windows 11. This isn't an endorsement, by the way. We don't know if this tool
is malware. It's just an example. People want AI removal tools because the world
is turning to slop, which is the 2025 Miriam Webster word of the year. Maybe
this is God's way of answering our prayers. Dear God, please bring back
Clippy and smite this Mo AI Miko AI baby
blob thing. I wish to see its face no more. You got it. The RAM apocalypse
continues as several companies have announced a new round of price
increases, including Framework, which is increasing the price of its laptop DDR5
kits by 50%, and Dell, which will be
raising the prices of their enterprise PC products from 10 to 30%, depending.
Framework says they solemnly do pledge
to stay transparent, only raising prices to cover real cost increases and
lowering them again if costs fall. But I don't know. They are a for-profit
company. I'm not going to hold my breath for that. Lionus is invested in them. I
am only invested in having a good time.
Meanwhile, Dell and Lenovo are reportedly considering limiting their
mid-range laptops to just 8 GB of DDR5
RAM. I thought we were living in a 16 to 32 GB era, but maybe this will force
software developers to make less memory hungry products. Or maybe you're just
going to get a worse laptop for your money. Probably that one. But wait,
there's more. According to YouTuber Moore's Law is Dead, Samsung is winding
down production of cheaper SATA SSDs
next year to focus on pricier memory and storage for AI data centers, which as
these kind of moves often do, could mean fewer options on the market and even
higher prices for regular consumers. Don't be sad, okay? Think about how
happy Samsung shareholders are going to be. Imagine hearing the laughter of
children, but they're grown up and spending most of their time on on their
ketamine yacht when they should be spending time with our sponsor,
MicroEnter. It's December and that means it's shopping season. Whether you've got
gifts to buy or you just need a bit of personal retail therapy to get through
the seasonal effective disorder, MicroEnter has you covered with deals
changing throughout the entire month. Like this gaming PC with 32 gigs of RAM
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guy. You know, when I think about Winter, I can't help but think about
Phoenix, Arizona, where the grand opening of their new MicroEnter has been
a huge success. Learn about that and all sorts of tech stuff through MicroEnter
News. They've even got holiday gift guides. So, check out MicroEnter in the
link below for all your holiday tech shopping needs and more. They're great.
I'm referring to the Quickbits, of course. iRoot, the maker of the Roomba
robot vacuum, has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy and agreed to be bought out
by its main Chinese manufacturer, Pyia
Robotics. That's got to be what it is. Or in their own robotic words, iRoot
announces strategic transaction to drive long-term growth plan. Much clearer. Why
didn't Why didn't we say that first? The deal comes after years of mounting debt,
stiff competition, and a failed Amazon acquisition, and will take iRoot private
under Piscia through a courts supervised restructuring expected to finish by
early 2026. I don't think I'm saying Pyia right, but here we are. But at
least app support and product services will continue as usual. So, don't worry,
not much is changing for all you room
baddies, uh, room ballers. We looked
into it and the Roomba doesn't appear to have a fan club with a cute name for me
to reference in a joke here, which seems like a real missed opportunity. What are you guys doing? Google's doing their
favorite thing and shutting down features. This time they're axing the
dark web data leak reports feature for Google 1 subscribers, which will have
all of its data deleted by February. Apparently, feedback showed that this
feature didn't really help users act on leaks. So, Google's just going back to
saying, "Oh, you want security? Just turn on two-factor authentication." Why
haven't you turned on two-factor authentication yet? What's wrong with you? Google has also locked the standard
continued conversation feature, which allows you to keep talking to your smart
device without saying, "Hey Google," every 3 seconds, sorry, behind a 10
bucks a month Google Home Premium subscription. This weekend, I couldn't
even get Gemini to play a Spotify song, something Google Assistant handled fine.
Can't even play Spotify. This This is hell. This is a bad place. An Intel
Panther Lake chip was spotted running in a 1x player handheld. Thanks to a leaked
firmark run, the chip was a Core Ultra 5
338H with an integrated Intel Arc B370
GPU, and it scored 2383 points, roughly
GeForce GTX 1060 level. Although,
Firmark is less of a gaming benchmark and more of a stress test. So, let's not
write Panther Lake off just yet. That's for later. If you want to feel excited
about Intel, however misguided that may be, check out this now deleted reply
tweet from the official Intel gaming account seemingly confirming the rumored
ArcB770. They say they're thrilled that this fan
is pumped about the B770, making sure to also mention the other two things the
fan was pumped about as well, and throw in some friendly emojis. Uh, I'm pretty
sure this is an AI. It's a bot reply. The B770 is canceled, everyone. OpenAI
has revealed it's using its C codeex coding agent to help improve its C
codeex coding agent. The system can reportedly monitor its own training runs
and when prompted decide what code changes to make next, meaning this AI
has taken another step towards a self-improving singularity situation.
Although the nerds told it to do that, so don't panic yet. The nerds at Google
DeepMind also announced its first automated research lab in the UK, where
a blend of AI systems and robotics in
the facility will, I guess, automatically make scientific
discoveries in material science. Here's hoping they come up with something good.
I'm going to go spend the week on that very fun yacht we talked about earlier.
Oh, but first, the US government has launched a new US tech force to rapidly
recruit skilled tech workers into the federal government. The plan is to bring
in a thousand engineers, data scientists, and developers for 2-year
stints and have them work on what the government is calling the world's most
complex and difficult problems
doing it for government people. problems
which somehow have rapidly sprung up after the government laid off all of
those tech workers that it laid off earlier this year. Critics warned the
program could pose serious conflicts of interest since many recruits are
expected to come directly from major tech companies where they may return
after 2 years of accessing all kinds of juicy government data. If only there was
some way to keep them focused on what really matters. Enter the Stanford
researchers who developed this audio shield system. It helps people with ADHD
focus by amplifying the sounds of
everyday tasks instead of blocking them out. The wearable device uses
microphones and earbuds to turn actions like typing, washing hands, or handling
objects into real time audio cues that
they say will boost mindfulness and attention while you're doing stuff.
Basically, it's like a hearing aid. It just makes everything louder. In early
studies, users stayed on tasks longer and reported higher focus. So, next time
a loud talker is distracting you from your work, don't tell them to keep it
down. Tell them to turn that up. It might just change your life. And so,
we'll coming back this Wednesday for more tech news. In the meantime, I've
got a wicked craving for a bowl of cereal. It's magically delicious.
Hopefully, there's got to be some around here somewhere. I'll just follow my
nose. We can remember all that stuff.