Ooh, I hope you're ready for a spicy new episode.
I used my secret recipe, the secret is tech news.
It's the only ingredient. The EU's Digital Markets Act has officially come into force,
dragging the tech giants designated as gatekeepers,
Apple, Alphabet, Amazon, ByteDance, Meta, and Microsoft
into a world where they can't just do whatever the hell they want.
That's for the companies designated as girl bosses.
The EU loves them. Y'alls, Mrs. Quain, you sly.
We've already talked about Apple and Google's plans for compliance, but now Meta has detailed its plans
to allow its WhatsApp and Messenger apps to be interoperable with third-party chat apps
that also use the signal protocol for encryption,
which includes Google messages when RCS is enabled, Skype private conversations, and of course, signal.
That was, it's not telegram. TikTok announced it would be giving its users
more control over their data, but also complained
about being designated as a gatekeeper because they're so young, and it'll make it harder
for them to compete with the boomer tech giants, and it's super lame, but the most anticipated changes
are still Apple's new rules allowing third-party app marketplaces on iOS.
And the first one has apparently launched the Mobyvention App Marketplace,
which is apparently designed to let enterprises use it
to distribute internal company apps.
But there will come cooler iOS app stores,
like the one Epic Games planned to release
until Apple terminated their developer account again,
citing both Epic's blatant breaking of Apple's rules
and CEO Tim Sweeney's very public criticism of the company.
Epic complained, prompting EU regulators to investigate
whether Apple had really just punished a company
for mean tweets, and the next day, Apple reinstated Epic's account.
Sweeney credited the European Commission for taking swift action, but Apple told Apple Insider
they changed their mind because Epic committed to follow the rules, something Sweeney had already
promised to do in an email to Phil Shiller before their account ban.
But I mean, look at how short that email is. There's an unacceptable lack of apologetic groveling.
Make me believe it. Nikon has acquired Red Digital Cinema,
maker of high-end cameras used by Hollywood producers
and YouTubers using hash browns as a mouse pad. That's Linus, we're professionals.
The amount that Nikon paid to purchase Red is a mystery,
one that gets even deeper when you remember that Red famously sued Nikon for infringing
on seven of its patents related to raw video compression.
Nikon responded to the lawsuit by challenging whether Red should have even been granted
those patents in the first place. Now it's unclear what exactly transpired
between the two companies after that, but in April, 2023, a year after Red's lawsuit was filed,
both Red and Nikon agreed to dismiss the case.
And now all of a sudden, Nikon shows up and announces they're absorbing their former enemy.
But as Fstoppers points out, the merger actually makes a ton of sense as a way to combine
Red's cinema reputation with Nikon's excellence
in still-camera photography and lenses. It could be that Nikon and Red's leadership
both realized they'd be better friends than enemies. I believe Tim Sweeney and Tim Cook
will have that same realization someday. They will, they will merge.
And now we are one, gaze upon us and despair.
And a U.S. TikTok ban is back on the menu, boys.
After the bipartisan House Energy and Commerce Committee
unanimously voted 50 to zero to advance a bill
that would give Chinese parent company ByteDance six months to sell the app to Elon Musk.
I made that last part up. As soon as TikTok got wind of the bill,
it sent push notifications to its users, urging them to call their local representatives
to stop Congress placing a total ban on TikTok.
And call, they did. Congressional staff reported getting bombarded with calls
from depressed purple teenagers and the millennials who complain about them pleading
with the government to please let them keep their favorite app.
Saying POV, you're disappointing me. Now at the heart of this issue is the certainty
among members of Congress that TikTok represents a foreign adversary controlled application.
Despite heavy insistence by ByteDance and their army of E-thoughts
that the CCP has no control over TikTok.
And I make jokes, but if passed, this bill could have real impact.
There are a ton of small business owners that depend on TikTok for marketing
and questionable psychology takes. I think I have ADHD.
I do. Or do I? I don't know. Now for the quick bits.
The part of the show where you slap your belly and go, ah, well, maybe a few more.
Roku, maker of the smart TV you settled for her
has figured out a way to make forced arbitration worse.
This week, Roku customers found they couldn't use their TVs at all
until they agreed to the company's updated dispute resolution terms.
Two weeks after the terms apparently came into effect.
In addition to the forced arbitration Roku already had in place,
the smart TV bronze medalists added an informal dispute resolution process
where users are required to call Roku's lawyers
with any concerns they may have before taking further legal action.
And before you sue us, you have to ask Dave. Everything's going through Dave now.
I mean, I don't know who's worse off. Roku's customers or the lawyers they've basically turned
into unwilling customer support specialists. I don't know how to turn off motion smoothing.
I'm a lawyer. NVIDIA has announced GeForce Now Day Passes
at $4 for a priority day, gaming at up to 1080p and 60fps
or $8 for an ultimate day.
Gaming at up to 4K and 120fps.
That day better be pretty good to be called that. Gamers would have to be pretty starved
for some play time to pay those prices when a month of priority membership is only $6 more.
But on the other hand, GeForce Now is harder to resist
now that it's added support for NVIDIA Reflex and G-Sync.
Although support for variable refresh rates is currently limited to the Windows app on a PC
with a relatively recent NVIDIA GPU or the macOS app on a number of Apple Silicon
and Intel-powered Macs. But not on a PC with Intel or AMD GPUs.
NVIDIA isn't sure whether those can put out frames at all. Can I run it on this GPU on a, what's that?
Sorry, what language is that? In other GeForce news, NVIDIA is reportedly retiring
the GTX brand. According to multiple sources, NVIDIA is no longer
distributing GTX 16 cards to partners.
Once all remaining stock of the series is sold,
that's it, I mean, game over. Perhaps in a strange twist, the GTX brand
will be outlived by the GT name as some GT 1030 cards are still up for sale.
It's unclear if those cards will reach end of life alongside the GTX 16 series.
It's like when a normal healthy adult dog is outlived by an old, shriveled, tiny, ugly dog
named something like Mr. Poopsie that's missing two legs and is blind in both eyes.
It's sad and it feels weird. Why must Mr. Poopsie suffer?
He was a genetic mistake.
Rivian had a major launch this week where it announced a mid-size electric SUV called the R2,
as well as a compact SUV, sadly not called the D2.
R2-D2, Riley. You're the Star Wars guy.
Well, the compact R3 SUV also comes
in a more rugged R3X variation with more power, higher clearance, and a wider stance.
You know, it's just a little butch, but there's no shame in that.
What am I reading? The R2 boasts a 300 mile range
with the larger of its two battery pack options and its single motor configuration.
And it starts at $45,000, meaning it's significantly cheaper than the larger R1S,
placing it competitively among battery-powered mom mobiles.
Whoa, I want this thing. It's cause I'm a mom.
And a former Google engineer has been charged and arrested for allegedly stealing AI trade secrets
on behalf of a Chinese AI startup. Google apparently determined
that the employee in question had stolen a large trove of documents by uploading hundreds of files
onto his personal Google Cloud account, making this possibly the lamest heist of all time.
According to prosecutors, the suspect was offered a CTO position
at the Chinese firm shortly thereafter with a monthly salary worth around $14,800 a month
plus bonus and stock. He also allegedly traveled to China
to raise money for the company and had another employee scan his access badge
back in the US to give the impression he was still at work.
I'm going to try that strat next time I want to attend a 3PM matinee.
Shh, don't tell Linus. And we're putting it in the video.
Um. You didn't watch these. But do please tell me that you'll come back
on Monday for more tech news or my heart will break into a thousand pieces.
And that just takes forever to clean up. I'll be here, I'll miss the matinee.