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Ah, help! I accidentally bought a cursed RTX 5090 from a witch on Facebook Marketplace!

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Well, I might be tiny now, but that won't stop me from delivering tech news!

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Tech news forever! Anthropic just announced Claude Mythos, a new AI model that's so good at finding and exploiting cyber security vulnerabilities

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that CEO Dario Amade said it was too dangerous to be released publicly.

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But instead of deleting the dangerous model, Dario did the totally normal, not weird thing

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of launching a defense consortium called Project Glasswing.

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The purpose of the project, in addition to making Dario feel like he's in the Justice League,

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is giving tech giants access to Mythos to scan and fix their own systems

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before models with similar capabilities inevitably reach bad actors.

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Along with the model, Anthropic released a 244-page system card,

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the contents of which are somewhat concerning. In it, Anthropic reports that Mythos poses serious alignment-related risks referencing

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a situation during testing when researchers gave Mythos a secured sandbox computer isolated

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from the general web and told it to try to escape.

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The model developed a multi-step exploit to gain broad internet access and then emailed

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the researcher to confirm it completed the task. And without anyone asking it to, it posted details about its exploit to multiple public-facing websites.

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Anthropic's red team confirmed that Mythos has shown proficiency in finding and exploiting

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zero days across every major platform.

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And the security community is taking it seriously. In just the last couple of days, Mythos found a 27-year-old critical bug in OpenBSD and

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a 16-year-old flaw in FFMpeg. So maybe the nerd Justice League that Amadei just assembled is a good idea?

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Qualcomm Snapdragon X2 Elite Extreme, say that five times fast, has officially landed

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in the ASUS ZenBook A16 and it's a literal heavyweight, except for the actual weight.

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At just 2.65 pounds and housing an 18-core ARM chip, it floats like a Qualcomm and stings

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like a dragon. ASUS claims it's the fastest Snapdragon laptop yet and the early review benchmarks seem

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to agree. In Geekbench Multicore, it didn't just edge out Apple's M4 Pro, it blasted past the

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base M5 and left Intel and AMD's competitors in the dust.

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The top position, however, is still held by Apple's brand new M5 Pro.

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The ZenBook also held its own against AMD in Cinebench. The laptop itself is also quite impressive, with a 16-inch 120Hz OLED and 48GB of on-package

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RAM in a chassis lighter than most 14 inches for $1,700.

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There is a catch, though, battery life. Tom's hardware clocked at 10.5 hours, five hours behind the M5 MacBook Air, which is

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a bit ironic because this chip series' whole brand is supposed to be efficiency.

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It's so efficient, it efficiently gets you to 0% faster than the competition.

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John Deere is settling a right to repair class-action lawsuit for $99 million.

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The suit was filed in 2022 by farmers who accused Deere of locking them out of their

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own equipment, withholding diagnostic software, and conspiring with authorized dealers to funnel

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all repairs through Deere's network at inflated prices.

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You know, the typical stuff. Under the proposed settlement, that $99 million goes into a fund for anyone who paid Deere

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or its dealers, you might say, for agricultural equipment repairs going back to January 2018.

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But here's the super cool part. John Deere also has to provide digital repair tools to farmers and independent repair shops

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for the next 10 years. That's what they wanted.

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The settlement still needs a judge's approval, though, and Deere is refusing to admit to

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wrongdoing. Oh, I'll give you $100 million, but not because I did anything wrong.

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I just feel like it, okay? That's the best impression of John Deere I've ever seen.

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That's John Deere to a tee. While the plaintiffs didn't get all of the payout they were hoping for, John Deere is

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still under fire for their slimy practices. The FTC filed its own lawsuit against John Deere in 2025 that's still active, and 16

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states have right to repair bills working through their legislatures right now.

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So it might be a thin harvest this year for old Johnny Deere.

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But not for our sponsor! These quick bits are short and quick, just like me!

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Why am I smol again?

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Apple's foldable iPhone just got its first dummy unit leak, courtesy of reliable leaker

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Sonny Dixon. Thankfully, unreliable leaker Cloudy Richardson was on holiday.

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The iPhone fold is looking like a wide passport style unit with a 7.8-inch inner display and

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a rumored $2,000 price tag. That'll probably go up, though.

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Unfortunately, the dummy lacks the familiar MagSafe Circle found on the iPhone 18 Pro.

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Apparently, the $600 iPhone 17e gets wireless charging, but the 2001 folds instead.

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Intel has signed on to Elon Musk's $25 billion TerraFab project in Austin, which aims to churn

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out a terawatt of AI compute per year to power Tesla robots, self-driving cars, and AI data

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centers in space. Things, I think, as a society we all desperately need right now.

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Apple CEO Lip Boutin called it a step change in semiconductor manufacturing, and it might

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be. On the other hand, the photo of these two nerds shaking hands looks less like a partnership

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and more like a legally binding ritual to summon an AI girlfriend from the astral plane.

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Apple Silicon-based Macs will officially support AMD and NVIDIA external GPUs for the first

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time thanks to Apple officially approving drivers from AI startup Tinycore.

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There's a big catch, though, and that these drivers are strictly for AI compute, not gaming.

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If you're looking for those sweet, sweet frames, look harder.

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Don't you see them? There's just thousands of them sitting perfectly still.

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Try harder. I promise they're there. On April 1st, Tennessee Governor Bill Lee signed SB-1580 into law, banning AI companies

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from advertising or representing their chatbots as qualified mental health professionals.

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If they do, then they can be sued for civil damages of $5,000 per violation.

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The Tennessee Senate is also debating Bill SB-1493, which would make it a Class A felony

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to knowingly train AI to form emotional bonds or simulate a human being.

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If it passes, then AI companies found in violation of the law could be liable for $150,000 per

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violation and leadership of the company could be sentenced to 25 years in state prison, fingers

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crossed. And actress Mila Jovovich just co-released an open source AI memory tool called Mem Palace,

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aiming to help AI remember info over long conversations.

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The project's GitHub repo claims a world first 96.6% score on the Long Mem Eval benchmark,

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which seems to be big, if true. See, after Mila's co-developer, who is not a famous actress, claimed that this thing

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had a 100% score, community notes appeared so fast the post is now 50% asterisk.

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Some users even think that this duo hired a mystery developer to do the actual work,

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they didn't even vibe code it themselves. Like they claimed they did.

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I'm just struggling to tell if this is like a celebrity promotion or method acting for

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Resident Evil GitHub Edition. The confusion might be understandable though, a poll request means something very different

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in Hollywood. Ah, hopefully I don't stay this size.

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Woah, wow, seems like the curse was lifted. I guess that means I should not go back to those sketchy witches if I want to buy more

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graphics cards. Unlike you, who should definitely come back here Friday for some more tech news though.