Oh, hey, I got your order, I tech news here.
Would you mind if I just, can you just close the door?
Just so I can take a photo, just quick, just close the door. Okay, thank you.
So is that, is that how things are delivered now for anyone else? Cause it's weird.
Anyway, tech news. Apple is planning some revolutionary changes to iPhone
according to the latest newsletter from he who seeeth all apples,
Bloomberg's Mark of House Germeides.
At Apple's September event, we're going to get the iPhone 17 Air.
The super, super slim device, German says is meant to replace the iPhone 16 Plus.
In exchange for its increased risk of bending, you'll get less battery life,
only a single rear camera and no SIM card slot,
even outside the US. You know, life comes with trade-offs.
Thankfully, September's event will reportedly also feature
just our regular iPhone 17, 17 Pro and 17 Pro Max,
although I predict even the most normy Apple fans
will still be side-eyeing the slim one. That's probably worse,
but what if they're the first of their friends to get it?
But 2026 is when things get interesting
with the iPhone 18 fold. In case the name had you stumped that one's going to compete
with the various other foldable phones, finally giving the Apple stands an option.
And then in 2027, 20 years after the launch of the first iPhone,
we're getting a special curved glass iPhone, which previous rumors have described
as having potentially no ports at all. Just a smooth, unbroken surface.
Like how Kindles look under their tiny designer shorts.
Just like Asrock's revolutionary 12-volt high-power GPU cable update,
which is a segue that made sense before I edited this script. Ploof helped me write it because he is a saint.
And so is Asrock, not only for making the 90 degree connector,
dozens of you might have been asking for, but for making the pins light green
so you can easily tell if it's fully inserted into your GPU
or not, imagine. And if you're still not satisfied,
there's a nifty little NTC sensor you plug in
that shuts down your PC if it starts overheating.
Something that I have to assume just got invented this year
or why wasn't it in there already? Look at this point, I don't even care if it was NVIDIA who started this whole mess.
I'm just happy to see somebody trying to fix it, even if they're wasting valuable marketing dollars
trying to convince you to put stickers on the otherwise blank connector.
Just some pizzazz. It's okay, I've seen people spend money on stupider things
like Elon Musk, who says he's starting a new AI company
called Macro Hard.
But why? Well, he says it's a tongue-in-cheek name,
but the project is very real. He's claiming they can simulate everything
software companies like Microsoft do using AI.
I've said this before, but Elon claiming that something will happen has been proven
to be pretty good evidence that it will not. Although here's one exception to that rule,
Elon has gone through with his threat to have his other very real AI company, XAI,
sue Apple and OpenAI, who have allegedly colluded to maintain monopolies
in the smartphone and generative AI markets. Now he's accusing Apple of de-prioritizing Grock
in favor of OpenAI and chat GPT, and that's the only reason Grock never reached
the number one AI app spot on Apple's App Store.
It's definitely nothing to do with Grock identifying as Mecha Hitler very recently.
It also has nothing to do with today's sponsor.
What the heck? These are drill bits. I asked you for quick bits.
God, do I have to do everything around here? That's probably how teachers feel
when someone suggests arming them to help stop school shootings,
but someone else had a better idea. Drones.
Why not slap guns onto those bad boys, huh? And then just fly them into the schools
during an active shooting. Oh man. Well, that may soon be a reality
because there's only one governor of one state I can think of that would try this.
If you guessed Ron DeSantis and Florida, congratulations.
You win a trip to Alligator Alcatraz. Oh man.
You can tell Ploof wrote these. Okay. Unfortunately, Florida's not getting a Netflix house.
Oh man. They've started ticket pre-sales and announced the opening dates
for the events at Philadelphia on November 12th
and Dallas, December 11th. These are free to enter experiences,
spanning over 100,000 square feet that feature their biggest and most successful shows
like Squid Game and Love is Blind. So it's kind of like Disneyland,
but you don't pay to get in. Might speak to its quality.
We'll have to see. Lunch probably is less than $100 though.
Something you might pay for soon is a quirky new food delivery robot.
Gee, I really hope all of those laid off compside majors
aren't looking for gig work in the next couple of years because it looks like Clankers are coming for that too.
Ploof, you're gonna get us killed by the AI when it takes over.
Okay, the Robomart RM5 has 10 lockers,
operates on public roads and carries up to 500 pounds of goods.
Well, it's got me beat. That's rude to me.
Too bad it doesn't have NVIDIA's new robot brainpowering it.
The Jetson AGX Thor Dev Kit
is now on sale for $3,500 and ships next month.
Honestly, it sounds like a pretty good business strategy.
You buy the Dev Kit for thousands, and then once you've prototyped your robot,
you turn around and buy the Thor T5000 modules
from NVIDIA for more thousands. But hey, buy in bulk and save some money.
If you need more than a thousand Thor chips, they'll only cost you 3,000 a pop.
Do we think that mom and pop shops are buying like fleets of robots or something?
And on the red team side of things, hardware leaker Momomo leaked their 2026
and 2027 mobile roadmap. We're getting a Zen 5 refresh called Gorgon Point
with Strix Point, NPU and graphics in that.
Desktops will get Zen 6 in 2026,
but mobile has to wait a bit longer before Gator Range
and Medusa Point release for the more elite
and premium laptops seems reasonable, but we'll have to wait for Lisa Sue to confirm.
Oh, I'm getting a fake phone call from Lisa Sue. Hey, Lisa, can you tell me a little bit
about these mobile processors? Ah, come on, I signed the NDA.
What do you mean the one I signed five years ago isn't valid anymore?
You've got my signature, what more could you possibly want? Tech news?
Well, you'll have to come back on Wednesday for that.
Or the deal's off.
It goes for you too.