WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.080 Light speed is too slow. We're gonna have to go to ludicrous speed. 00:00:04.960 --> 00:00:13.440 Actually, Elon Musk kind of ruined that joke for me. Japanese researchers have announced a new record download speed of 402 terabits a second, 00:00:13.440 --> 00:00:18.960 using standard commercially available fiber optic cables. That's 25% faster than the former record, 00:00:18.960 --> 00:00:23.680 which is also crazy fast. That's fast enough to download the entire 400 Gigabyte file for 00:00:23.680 --> 00:00:29.760 ARK Survival Evolved in under seven thousandths of a second. These engineers used as many 00:00:29.760 --> 00:00:35.600 transmission bands as possible in combination with bleeding edge amplifiers and gain equalizers 00:00:35.600 --> 00:00:44.400 liven to achieve a total signal bandwidth of 37.6 terahertz. Sadly, even the highest end gaming rig 00:00:44.400 --> 00:00:48.480 would be unable to take advantage of that kind of speed due to multiple hardware bottlenecks. 00:00:48.480 --> 00:00:52.720 Not to mention the total population collapse that will follow once gamers no longer have to leave 00:00:52.720 --> 00:00:58.160 their homes for the bare few hours it takes to install Cod. Regardless, there are more modest 00:00:58.160 --> 00:01:02.960 innovations that users can access in the here and now, such as the newly launched Thunderbolt 5, 00:01:02.960 --> 00:01:10.240 which offers an amazing but comparatively piddling 120 gigabit per second of bandwidth and 240 watts 00:01:10.240 --> 00:01:15.840 of power. The new cords are available for about the cost of a relatively decadent burrito bowl, 00:01:15.840 --> 00:01:20.320 which would be great if only there were more than a single model of laptop available with 00:01:20.320 --> 00:01:25.760 Thunderbolt 5 ports right now. And also, these burrito bowls just keep, they're decadent. 00:01:29.440 --> 00:01:35.120 According to Android authorities, sources within Google tell them that the upcoming Pixel 9 will 00:01:35.120 --> 00:01:42.560 have new AI features. These include Admi, Studio, and Pixel screenshots. The first is apparently 00:01:42.560 --> 00:01:47.120 a camera feature that helps capture a group of people in a single shot, while the second is 00:01:47.120 --> 00:01:53.120 rumored to be some kind of AI image generator. As for pixel screenshots, sources say it's an 00:01:53.120 --> 00:01:59.120 opt-in feature that will collect user screenshots alongside metadata and an AI-generated summary 00:01:59.120 --> 00:02:03.200 of the image. I'll figure out a way to use it. Other leaks from the sources have claimed that 00:02:03.200 --> 00:02:09.520 all three Pixel 9 models, normal one pro and big one, will have M14 OLED screens from Samsung 00:02:09.520 --> 00:02:14.000 Display. There's also at least one guy waving around what appears to be a pink Pixel 9 on 00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:18.000 Twitter claiming that the phone is already out in Algeria. They always get things first. 00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:22.640 However, if it's a genuine Pixel 9, it's very likely he got it from a local reseller, 00:02:22.640 --> 00:02:28.240 not Google. However, if you don't want to give out any more of your life to a single company 00:02:28.240 --> 00:02:33.360 or the AI menace, there's always Proton's new end-to-end encrypted version of Google Docs 00:02:33.360 --> 00:02:38.720 with no AI training. Either that or you might consider simply walking into the sea, viewer of 00:02:38.720 --> 00:02:43.680 salt. The European Commission has charged Meta's social media platforms with violating the EU's 00:02:43.680 --> 00:02:49.360 Digital Markets Act. According to the Commission, Meta's binary choice of paid subscription with 00:02:49.360 --> 00:02:55.920 no ads or unpaid subscription with targeted ads is not offering users who don't want Mark Zuckerberg 00:02:55.920 --> 00:03:01.200 sniffing their dirty laundry an equivalent but less personalized product. He is an underwear 00:03:01.200 --> 00:03:06.240 sniffer, that guy. It's offering them an option they might choose and an option they definitely 00:03:06.240 --> 00:03:11.120 won't, which is paying 120 euros a year to watch your friends from high school get gradually more 00:03:11.200 --> 00:03:15.440 racist. The Commission laid similar charges against Apple and Microsoft last week, 00:03:15.440 --> 00:03:20.400 possibly indicating that they're just working their way down a list of the largest tech companies 00:03:20.400 --> 00:03:24.960 by market share. Speaking of which, France is reportedly preparing antitrust charges against 00:03:24.960 --> 00:03:30.320 NVIDIA after citing concerns about the closed nature and limited compatibility of NVIDIA's CUDA 00:03:30.320 --> 00:03:36.080 in a report on competition in generative AI. If any Americans feel like they're missing out, 00:03:36.080 --> 00:03:41.760 the FTC send warning letters to ASRock, Gigabyte, and Zotac for placing warranty void if removed 00:03:41.760 --> 00:03:46.080 stickers on their products and for implying that continued warranty coverage requires the use of 00:03:46.080 --> 00:03:51.120 specific parts and services when in fact you are free to repair your laptop with bacon if you see 00:03:51.120 --> 00:04:01.360 fit. This is America, dammit! Design company with a weird name, Figma, has disabled its recently 00:04:01.360 --> 00:04:06.800 launched AI-powered app design tool after accusations it was ripping off Apple's weather app. 00:04:06.800 --> 00:04:12.000 Developer Andy Allen found the two tools output remarkably similar. I mean, the AI-designed 00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:19.280 app even featured a matter baby. Whatever that is. Nothing, go back to sleep. Figma executives 00:04:19.280 --> 00:04:24.800 have since revealed they didn't train the model. It uses off-the-shelf LLMs as a bespoke design 00:04:24.800 --> 00:04:29.360 system that they commissioned but didn't make. Either they're lying or once again a tech company 00:04:29.360 --> 00:04:35.920 is shocked that haphazardly slapping a plagiarism machine and something has consequences. Figma 00:04:35.920 --> 00:04:41.280 balls. In the lead up to the American presidential catastrophe, I mean election, a network of websites 00:04:41.280 --> 00:04:46.160 apparently based out of Russia are pumping in large amounts of fake AI-generated news stories 00:04:46.160 --> 00:04:51.120 while pretending to be local American news outlets. They're using names like The Houston Post, 00:04:51.120 --> 00:04:58.160 The Boston Times, DC Weekly, and even the titles of real but defunct newspapers. The highest profile 00:04:58.160 --> 00:05:02.640 of these fake stories was a lurid claim that the first lady of Ukraine had bought a brand new 00:05:02.640 --> 00:05:09.120 Bugatti in Paris using money from American military aid. She then presumably burnt the Star Spangled 00:05:09.120 --> 00:05:12.560 Banner in front of a starving veteran and dropped a kick to puppy with terminal cancer. 00:05:12.560 --> 00:05:17.440 I heard she doesn't even like apple pie. She likes borsh pie. They're sick over there. 00:05:17.440 --> 00:05:21.680 Researchers at two Chinese universities have developed a brain-computer interface chip designed 00:05:21.760 --> 00:05:28.320 to allow small lab-grown brain organoids to control electronics and eventually robots. 00:05:28.320 --> 00:05:32.160 And my brain is definitely an organoid. This is not sci-fi, this is actually real, although that 00:05:32.160 --> 00:05:37.600 picture of the little brain ball in the robot is just a mock-up. Processing chips powered by hundreds 00:05:37.600 --> 00:05:42.400 of thousands of human brain cells are currently being developed by cortical Labs in Australia, 00:05:42.400 --> 00:05:47.200 University of Indiana researchers, and Swiss startup Final Spark, who are researching using 00:05:47.280 --> 00:05:52.000 dopamine as a reward mechanism. What we really need is other scientists to create adolescent 00:05:52.000 --> 00:05:57.280 anthropomorphic fighting reptiles to take these things down if they get out of hand and also 00:05:57.280 --> 00:06:02.320 prop up the pizza economy. A new San Francisco app called Two Night wants to help people determine 00:06:02.320 --> 00:06:07.360 what nightclub they want to hit by installing cameras in partner venues and live streaming 00:06:07.360 --> 00:06:12.880 club interiors. And you're not gonna believe this, but some clubgoers are upset. Sure, 00:06:12.880 --> 00:06:16.160 the average American is captured on multiple security cameras every day, but those camera 00:06:16.160 --> 00:06:21.360 feuds aren't turning random people trying to have fun into involuntary reality TV stars. 00:06:21.360 --> 00:06:25.440 If you want to observe people getting wilder and more embarrassing over time, that's what Twitter's 00:06:25.440 --> 00:06:31.760 for. And Drone Maker DJI has announced an electric mountain bike called the Amphlo Pluh, 00:06:31.760 --> 00:06:35.680 making what the company calls a natural move into an adjacent product category, 00:06:35.680 --> 00:06:40.080 perhaps because they're staring down the barrel of a US ban on their own drones, 00:06:40.080 --> 00:06:44.800 and the CCP has never spied on anyone through a bike yet. In other news, 00:06:44.880 --> 00:06:49.360 Sky Elements just got FAA approval to attach fireworks to its drones, 00:06:49.360 --> 00:06:53.520 because Americans might be scared of Chinese drones, but they're apparently fine with attaching 00:06:53.520 --> 00:06:57.920 glittery explosives to a swarm of flying American drones. And you should swarm on back 00:06:57.920 --> 00:07:01.600 to another episode of TechLink this Friday. Nobody's gonna lose a finger, I promise. It's 00:07:02.560 --> 00:07:07.040 almost never happened here. You could get de-gloved on this set though.