I typed tech news into the AI TechLink script generator,
but I got all this TikTok news instead. I mean, I guess it sounds kind of,
I don't know, I think it misheard me. After the US Supreme Court upheld
the TikTok ban law last week, TikTok took its own apps and services offline
in the US on Saturday night, serving users a pop-up explaining
that a law banning TikTok means that you can't use it.
It's very helpful. I'm sure some people needed that clearly laid out. But by the following morning,
TikTok said they were restoring service thanks to the now inaugurated US president
and freshly minted meme coin peddler, Donald Trump.
It's not concerning. It's actually hilarious and so based.
The president assured TikTok that their service providers won't be punished,
but someone should probably tell that to Republican Speaker of the House Mike Johnson
and to Republican senators who promised to uphold the law
and sue those same service providers. The legal murkiness here is probably why TikTok
is still not re-listed on Google or Apple's app stores,
with Apple publishing a specific support document about the situation saying it is obligated
to follow the laws in the jurisdictions where it operates.
But I'm assuming Tim Cook forgot to add. And to add a few extra fees on top because fuck you.
Even if TikTok isn't back on the app stores yet,
it is online. But the same can't be said for other apps
owned by the same parent company Bite Dance, including mobile editing app CapCut,
which is just fine with Instagram who published a CapCut competitor on the weekend
called Edits. Worst of all, Gacha game Marvel Snap,
which is published by Bite Dance, is still offline.
And before you finish writing that comment telling me that it's not a Gacha game,
I haven't played it, so I wouldn't know, but it is.
So what the heck just happened? Why can't we ban TikTok?
Well, one analyst told the Associated Press that by abruptly shutting off service,
TikTok proved how unpopular the ban was among its users.
Which was a big surprise. We thought they'd be completely on board.
But it doesn't seem like TikTok is getting off Scott free.
Trump says he wants an American entity to own 50% of TikTok.
And after all this kerfuffle, representatives of Bite Dance and the Chinese government have indicated
they are open to discuss this idea. So now we still have TikTok and Red Note,
the other Chinese app paying US influencers to promote it as a TikTok replacement.
And as a bonus, we also have new TikTok style
doomscrolly video feeds on Blue Sky and Twitter.
But we don't need the TikTok replacements now. Can we roll those back?
Now, at the risk of sounding political,
I just think it's worth pointing out how many big tech CEOs were at Trump's inauguration.
Mark Zuckerberg, Jeff Bezos, Tim Cook, Sundar Pichai,
and of course, Elon Musk, and even TikTok CEO, Shu Ziu.
This doesn't usually happen. And following Trump into a church service afterwards
is also a bit unusual and uncomfortable. I mean, the sensation of your skin burning
underneath your suit cannot be pleasant. Oh, okay, I think the AI thought about it some more.
And now it wants to give me some non-TikTok tech news.
Well, if the AI says so, okay. If you're in the market for a Ryzen X3D CPU, beware.
Fake versions of the Ryzen 7 9800 X3D
are reportedly on the rise. And while that's nothing new,
there's nothing worse than installing a new chip only to find out its secret sauce is cheese whiz.
But when it comes to robots, China's tech is a lot more impressive,
especially when it comes to running fast. So this spring, the country is set to hold
the world's first human slash robot marathon in Beijing,
which the South China Morning Post describes as part of efforts to combat the challenges
of an aging society and a falling birth rate.
I don't know how a robot marathon will help with that,
but I mean, distract the sad people with fast robots.
Hey, I hope it works. 3D printer manufacturer Bamboo Lab
was criticized this week for locking down its 3D printers,
blocking or making it very difficult to control them through third-party software.
Some frustrated users soon managed to extract the authentication certificate
for the Bamboo Connect app. And whether that had anything to do with it
or not, Bamboo Lab actually backtracked, or maybe they'd say they clarified
that their recent update will not block third-party software, but rather ensure it continues to work
while enhancing security. So you won't be hacked
while making all those 3D printed guns. The chief of Europol, the EU's primary law enforcement
agency, told the Financial Times today that big tech has a responsibility
to give the police access to criminals' encrypted messages,
which the criminals use to remain anonymous. But if they're anonymous, how do you know they're criminals?
Just kidding, this is a complicated issue, but given that government backdoors
led to Chinese hackers basically having unfettered access
to America's communications networks, and they're still in there,
I'm just wondering what the real responsible thing to do is.
And last week, somebody slapped Doom into a PDF.
This week, it's Microsoft Word. Yep, software engineer Vojcik Gry
was apparently inspired by Doom PDF
to set up a VBA macro to display the game's frames
as .bmp files in the document.
It appears to run smoother than the PDF version, so give it a shot if you're looking to confuse
your company's activity tracking software. This guy must be so productive.
And if you wanna be extra productive, come back here on Wednesday.
We'll get you back up to speed on all the tech news so you can go back to working and won't be distracted
because, I mean, why would you check Reddit? You already know everything.