WEBVTT 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.160 It's Star Wars Day, so may the fourth be with that baby Yoda movie or whatever that's coming out soon because 00:00:09.280 --> 00:00:11.440 CO-Bible knows they're gonna need it! 00:00:12.480 --> 00:00:21.600 GameStop has just put forward a 56 billion dollar offer to buy eBay. The e-commerce giant was evidently 00:00:21.600 --> 00:00:27.600 caught off guard by the bid and responded with the energy of every girl I asked out in middle school 00:00:27.680 --> 00:00:33.040 saying it received no communication from GameStop prior to the entirely unsolicited offer. 00:00:33.040 --> 00:00:42.480 Sounds like what happens on Snapchat these days. To give you a sense of scale, eBay has a market cap over four times the size of GameStop itself, 00:00:42.480 --> 00:00:48.640 making this a wild swing for the retailer. Again, much like my middle school attempts at romance, 00:00:48.640 --> 00:00:54.480 it's funny because I really kept myself. The funds for the proposal are evidently split 50-50 00:00:54.480 --> 00:00:59.040 between cash and GameStop stock, though it's unclear from the wording if they're referring to 00:00:59.040 --> 00:01:06.240 shares or $28 billion worth of scratched up trade-in Crash Bandicoot CDs. A middle schooler's fortune. 00:01:06.240 --> 00:01:11.920 According to CEO Ryan Cohen, it's part of a larger strategy to pivot into e-commerce, 00:01:11.920 --> 00:01:17.280 leveraging GameStop's retail locations as a fulfillment network. However, Cohen likely 00:01:17.280 --> 00:01:23.600 has a more personal motive, as his incentive structure guarantees him $35 billion in stock 00:01:23.680 --> 00:01:30.800 if he can boost GameStop's market value to $100 billion. God, that's a lot of funko pops. 00:01:30.800 --> 00:01:37.360 The FCC has unanimously voted to advance a proposal banning all Chinese testing Labs 00:01:37.360 --> 00:01:43.280 from certifying U.S.-bound electronics with FCC chair and former Witch King of Angmar, 00:01:43.280 --> 00:01:50.400 Brendan Carr, citing national security concerns before he screamed like a banshee. 00:01:50.640 --> 00:01:57.520 It's part of a wider crackdown that has already seen the agency ban the import of new Chinese-made 00:01:57.520 --> 00:02:03.280 consumer routers and drones. This move is expected to have a significant impact on consumer electronics 00:02:03.280 --> 00:02:11.440 since roughly 75% of U.S.-bound devices are currently tested in Chinese Labs, forcing manufacturers to 00:02:11.440 --> 00:02:16.800 reroute certification through Labs in the U.S., Europe, or Taiwan. According to the new rule, 00:02:16.800 --> 00:02:21.920 existing devices can still be sold for up to two years after their certification date, 00:02:21.920 --> 00:02:28.000 but the expectation is that older devices that have to be retested will probably just be pulled 00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:33.280 instead. It's unclear how manufacturers will deal with the drop in available testing facilities, 00:02:33.280 --> 00:02:39.120 but if the router ban is any indication, at least one random company will probably get a 00:02:39.120 --> 00:02:43.360 last-minute exemption, which is totally above board and unrelated to any kind of... 00:02:45.680 --> 00:02:48.560 favors. Please don't sue us, Netgear. 00:02:49.280 --> 00:02:56.080 Toyota's Woven City, the fully-surveilled corporate utopia they use to test robotic stuff 00:02:56.080 --> 00:03:02.320 at the base of Mount Fuji. This is real? That's sick. Wow. Sounds like from a spy novel or something. 00:03:02.320 --> 00:03:08.560 Anyway, they just got a new AI overlord called the Woven City AI Vision Engine, which sounds 00:03:08.560 --> 00:03:16.880 totally believable and not weird. All hail AI overlord. You'll seek to enter the Woven City. 00:03:17.680 --> 00:03:24.160 Anyway, this model ingests feeds from cameras, vehicles, traffic signals, and user inputs 00:03:24.160 --> 00:03:29.680 across the city to predict what residents are about to do, which is fine, because the residents 00:03:29.680 --> 00:03:35.520 are all Toyota employees and their families, who presumably signed something. About 100 people 00:03:35.600 --> 00:03:42.400 currently live there in a city built for about 2000, so the cameras to civilian ratio is generous, 00:03:42.400 --> 00:03:48.080 to say the least. Toyota also confirmed that chairman Akio Toyota has been uploaded to the 00:03:48.080 --> 00:03:56.640 cloud as Akia Toyota AI, a chapbot trained on a decade of his speeches and writings, 00:03:56.640 --> 00:04:02.160 so he can keep dispensing leadership and wisdom long after his meat form retires. 00:04:02.160 --> 00:04:07.760 Honestly, getting trapped in a penopticon run by a sentient AI CEO sounds stressful. 00:04:07.760 --> 00:04:13.600 At least we can blow off some steam with our sponsor. Now, I know it would be probably really good 00:04:13.600 --> 00:04:19.280 to do the quick bits here, but what if instead we just had Darth Maul show up again? You guys 00:04:19.280 --> 00:04:25.920 like him, right? Darth Maul? Subscribe. Microsoft's April Windows 11 update keeps finding new ways 00:04:25.920 --> 00:04:32.800 to ruin your day. After triggering boot loops, B-sods, and borking BitLocker, it's now breaking 00:04:32.800 --> 00:04:39.120 third-party backup apps like Macrium and Acronis. This time on purpose, though. We're happy about 00:04:39.120 --> 00:04:44.560 this? Microsoft blacklisted the kernel driver that these apps use over a security flaw and is 00:04:44.560 --> 00:04:50.480 telling users not to uninstall the patch. So your options are keep your backups or keep your PC 00:04:50.480 --> 00:04:56.400 from getting owned. Pick one, loser. Oh, you won't back up your PC. Get a grip. 00:04:56.400 --> 00:05:02.160 Maryland just became the first state to ban AI-driven surveillance pricing in grocery stores. 00:05:02.160 --> 00:05:07.760 Yay! Unfortunately, critics say the bill is riddled with carveouts and exemptions. Boo! 00:05:07.760 --> 00:05:12.720 What a rollercoaster. Consumer advocate and the internet's cool older brother who's looking 00:05:12.720 --> 00:05:20.000 out for you, Cory Doctorow, called the law all loophole. Anyway, Cory warned that lobbyists 00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:25.760 have drafted it to gut consumer protections. The criticism is well timed, as several other 00:05:25.760 --> 00:05:31.200 states are currently drafting similar bills. So here's hoping this will let us take a bite 00:05:31.200 --> 00:05:37.760 out of grocery store surveillance pricing. A court in Hangzhou, China ruled that companies can't 00:05:37.760 --> 00:05:44.000 legally fire workers just because AI is cheaper after a tech firm tried to demote a quality assurance 00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:51.440 employee from 25,000 yuan a month to 15,000 and canned him when he refused. The court said 00:05:51.440 --> 00:05:58.320 adopting AI is a business choice, not an unforeseeable disaster that voids your employment contract. 00:05:58.320 --> 00:06:03.760 A take so worker friendly, it probably won't survive the boat ride west. Blackberry stock 00:06:03.760 --> 00:06:09.920 jumped over 10% today after a Wall Street Journal profile reminded everyone that the company didn't 00:06:09.920 --> 00:06:16.560 die, it just pivoted. QNX, their software division, makes the operating system running 00:06:16.560 --> 00:06:24.240 lane keep, adaptive cruise, and crash detection in 275 million cars, and is now expanding into 00:06:24.240 --> 00:06:29.920 NVIDIA Robotics and German submarines. Of course. Which means the company that couldn't survive 00:06:29.920 --> 00:06:36.000 the iPhone is now keeping you alive at crush depth. Sleep tight, sailors. And a Cleveland 00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:42.320 startup called Sonic Firetech is selling a fire suppression system that uses inaudible 00:06:42.320 --> 00:06:47.920 infrasound waves instead of water or chemicals. And they just demoed putting out a kitchen 00:06:47.920 --> 00:06:53.280 grease fire with sound alone. Which everyone tries at first, but it doesn't do anything. 00:06:55.840 --> 00:07:01.600 A backpack version for wildland firefighters is also in testing, which I'm sure will go great 00:07:01.600 --> 00:07:06.800 until they find all the dead woodland creatures. Chipmunks are just not a thing anymore. 00:07:06.800 --> 00:07:14.800 Ah, the fire's out. Oh god. Mama. And I'll be setting you on fire in a video game if you don't 00:07:14.800 --> 00:07:20.160 come back Wednesday for more tech news. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go back to pretending 00:07:20.160 --> 00:07:24.320 Star Wars doesn't exist until the next Jedi Survivor sequel or they make something else 00:07:24.320 --> 00:07:29.360 as good as Andor. Because otherwise, what's the point? Okay, see ya.