Don't worry, tech news has been inside you the whole time.
Mostly because it's categorized as a non-essential surgery. Here, we'll distract you from the pain with some more tech news.
Perfect! So, E3 2023 is dead. That's pretty wild, though perhaps it isn't necessarily the most surprising
news when you look back. Last month, Ubisoft made the weird promise to attend E3 if E3 happens.
The company then dropped out this Monday and announced they would be hosting a separate
live event, much like Sony, Nintendo and Microsoft. So, either Ubisoft lied or they got the tiniest heads up about the doomed convention.
In an interview with Games Industry, the ESA, who organizes and presents E3,
has stated that marketing needs and game development being altered since COVID were
two of the main factors. Or maybe it was Jeff Keely.
Thanks, Jeff! Friggin' Jeff. Kill E3!
More like Jeff Keely. Back in 2020, the brief fun part of it, Keely said he would not be participating in E3 2020 due
to the direction the event was being taken. Two months after E3 2020 was canceled due to the
non-fun part, Jeff Keely announced Summer Game Fest, a fully virtual evolution of E3's formula,
and wouldn't you know it, it's still going strong. I guess people must like enjoying game events and special playable content from the comfort of home
without having to stand in any long lines or experience new and unique smells.
Smell a vision and games didn't last. Smell you later, don't even wanna smell you now.
Smell you never. AI is the gift that keeps on giving, at least for news headlines, otherwise reception is mixed.
For example, Italy decided to fully ban chatGPT, the country's data protection authority said it
had to do with privacy concerns, especially after the user conversation breach on the 20th of this
month. Though if you ask me, AI made the first strike when it generated this video of Will Smith
eating spaghetti. Speaking of AI visuals, mid-journey has decided to end
free trials of its AI image generator due to extraordinary demand and quote, abuse.
It might have something to do with all the totally real images of former President
Donald J. Trump being taken down by enthusiastic police that exploded on Twitter after old 45
truths socialed that he would be arrested. There was also that one time with Pope Francis,
although can you tell which one of these three images are real?
Because I can't. Because I can't see them. I'm looking into a camera.
And the Restrict Act might need some restrictions of its own, according to everyone other than
the U.S. government. The bill is receiving bipartisan support in the Senate and bipartisan
outrage in the news and social media. The legislation was ostensibly a response to
TikTok, but rather applies to any information and communication technology or ICT run by a
foreign adversary, which are the countries you expect, plus anyone that certain U.S. officials
agree on in the future, that poses a undo or unacceptable risk to national security or the
safety of United States persons. Because they speak two languages. In summary, it's broadly
worded so much so that digital rights experts believe the act could criminalize VPNs and
people could hypothetically go to jail for 20 years for using one. The communications director
for the bill's sponsor has stated the act isn't aimed at individual users, but the thing about
a spokesperson is that they aren't the bill. Does the bill say that? You know, that's the real
question. God willing. Bless. Will the Pope sign that? I mean, the bill mentions post quantum
cryptography and synthetic biology. Could you not have added a clause that said, hey,
people who use a VPN so they can watch vertical videos made by Zoomers won't go to jail?
Quick bits like these don't come around that often. Only three times a week every week.
Microsoft, who used to be a software company, has announced plans to integrate ads into Bing
Chat, the thing that finally got people to use Bing. It's no secret that Microsoft has been
trying to put ads into everything they can recently, so we can't be surprised that they're
seeing dollar signs after Bing Chat reached 100 million daily active users. Though it would be
funny if this was what killed Bing after people finally started using it. 100 million users,
those people need ads. Yeah, Google's assistant division is being reorganized to focus on Bard.
This makes sense since Google's assistant is good but has never made money, while Bard is bad and
also hasn't made money. But maybe it could. I imagine that's why the VP of engineering
for Google Assistant was replaced with a VP from Google's commerce organization.
Bold strategy? I'm sure he'll carve the cutest little tombstone when assistant is killed.
Amazon is suing three groups of Amazon sellers that it says abuse the tech giant's copyright
takedown system to file illegitimate complaints about their competitors. As long as they weren't
getting rid of illegitimate children. The bad actors even went so far as to create fake websites
as evidence that their competitors were copycats and ended up successfully taking down a number
of competing product listings. So it's good to see that Amazon has decided to care about at least
one of the many sketchy seller practices in its store. You don't want to get rid of all of them.
The store's got to have some character. A hobby lobby without a middle-aged woman having a glitter
fight in the back is just boring. I love Glenda.
General Motors is the latest automaker to Nick's support for CarPlay and Android Auto
in favor of a custom infotainment system complete with innovative new features,
like the ability to pay a monthly subscription for features that used to be free. But don't worry,
GM actually worked with Google to build their custom system, so it'll have Google Maps and
Assistant at no extra cost for eight years. Until then, they'll just be using the new system's
tighter integration with other vehicle systems to collect more data on driving habits. So yeah,
owners will have to pay more, but they'll also have more data collected, so it mostly balances
out, right? You know, like, yeah, like they make more money from the data and they make more money
from you paying for it. So everyone wins. And Nokia is building cell towers where they're most needed.
The moon. As part of NASA's Artemis program, the Finnish telecom company will be establishing
a 4G network on everyone's favorite natural satellite. The lunar network will allow NASA
to test if current cell technology is usable in outer space and definitely won't be used by
lonely astronauts to slide into Martian DMs. Hey, you up? You alive? But you can slide into a new
video on Monday when we'll have another piping hot batch of technicians. Fresh out of the oven.
Careful. They're hot.