1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,280 Yeah, over the long weekend, I worked on one of my famous interpretive dance sequences. 2 00:00:04,280 --> 00:00:08,440 Yeah, you wanna see, you wanna preview? Pretty, pretty risque stuff in here. 3 00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:12,040 Oh shoot, look at the time, we gotta do the tech news. Whoopsies. 4 00:00:12,040 --> 00:00:17,560 Apple has announced their new M5 chip, which will arrive in a refreshed iPad Pro, 5 00:00:17,560 --> 00:00:21,400 MacBook Pro, and Vision Pro one week from today. 6 00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:27,200 Apple says that in multi-threaded performance, the M5 is 15% faster than the M4, 7 00:00:27,200 --> 00:00:31,160 but more importantly, its 10-core GPU delivers four times 8 00:00:31,160 --> 00:00:34,840 the M4's peak compute, because this is 2025, 9 00:00:34,840 --> 00:00:37,880 and it's important to give AI as much power as it needs 10 00:00:37,880 --> 00:00:42,960 to melt our brains so we don't feel anything when our skulls are crushed under their metal heels. 11 00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:46,440 As for the new M5-equipped 14-inch MacBook Pro, 12 00:00:46,440 --> 00:00:52,600 iPad Pro, and Vision Pro, well, the M5 seems to be the only real new thing about them, 13 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:57,680 but if you're a total compute head, you can choose wrongly to pre-order them now, 14 00:00:57,680 --> 00:01:01,280 and when they ship on the 22nd, you can watch all your favorite shows 15 00:01:01,280 --> 00:01:05,840 on Apple's newly renamed streaming service, Apple TV. 16 00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:10,840 Plus, TV, TV plus? No, it's just Apple TV now, 17 00:01:10,840 --> 00:01:14,840 which is probably what half of you are already calling it anyway, while the other half screamed, 18 00:01:14,840 --> 00:01:20,340 Apple TV is the box, mom! Apple is right to call this a vibrant new identity 19 00:01:20,340 --> 00:01:25,000 for the platform. I love it when we talk about streaming services like they're our friend, Chris, 20 00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:28,440 changing the spelling of his name by removing the H. 21 00:01:28,440 --> 00:01:34,640 So much more vibrant, Chris. Almost as vibrant as the custom LaBooBoo given to Tim Cook 22 00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:38,800 by the creator of LaBooBoo himself. Oh, thank you. 23 00:01:38,800 --> 00:01:41,800 Introducing LaBooBoo 17. 24 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:46,800 Reviews are out for the ROG Xbox Ally and Xbox Ally X. 25 00:01:46,800 --> 00:01:50,240 ShortCircuit and Linus Tech Tips have both released videos 26 00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:53,700 about the new gaming handhelds for some reason, alongside many other people 27 00:01:53,740 --> 00:01:57,100 that don't work in this building. Seems like most reviewers are impressed 28 00:01:57,100 --> 00:02:03,220 by the Ally X's hardware and performance, but think a thousand bucks is a bit steep 29 00:02:03,220 --> 00:02:06,740 for something that seems to not even know whether it's a real Xbox or not. 30 00:02:06,740 --> 00:02:12,540 Make up your mind. And while the non-X Ally's price of $600 is smaller, 31 00:02:12,540 --> 00:02:16,500 it's actually an even greater obstacle, given the lackluster gaming chops 32 00:02:16,500 --> 00:02:21,180 of its arguably outdated chip design. We are just tearing into these things. 33 00:02:21,180 --> 00:02:25,180 They have some redeeming qualities. The joysticks are nice. 34 00:02:25,180 --> 00:02:28,820 Well, if the reviews for these new handhelds turn you off, don't worry. 35 00:02:28,820 --> 00:02:34,940 It sounds like you won't have to wait long for new consoles. Generally reliable AMD leaker Kepler L2 36 00:02:34,940 --> 00:02:40,380 stated on a NeoGap forum that the specs for PlayStation's next console are finalized 37 00:02:40,380 --> 00:02:45,980 and YouTuber, Moore's Law Is Dead, has revealed alleged details about the next gen Xbox 38 00:02:45,980 --> 00:02:49,060 and its Magnus APU from AMD. 39 00:02:49,060 --> 00:02:53,340 Now with the leaked specs in mind, WCCF Tech says that the next gen Xbox 40 00:02:53,380 --> 00:02:57,860 will have the hardware edge compared to its PlayStation contemporary. 41 00:02:57,860 --> 00:03:03,300 What a crazy moment for Xbox. One day they're dying, never releasing hardware again 42 00:03:03,300 --> 00:03:08,760 and being relegated to a game streaming service. And the next, they're pumping out powerful handhelds 43 00:03:08,760 --> 00:03:13,140 and supposedly winning the console wars of 2027, 44 00:03:13,140 --> 00:03:16,700 a year when AI will just play our games for us 45 00:03:16,700 --> 00:03:19,780 and it won't matter anyway. It'll be so much better. 46 00:03:19,780 --> 00:03:22,900 Speaking of AI, open AI CEO, Sam Altman 47 00:03:22,900 --> 00:03:29,020 has announced that ChatGPT will be able to engage in erotic conversations with verified adult users 48 00:03:29,020 --> 00:03:32,580 by December, clock's ticket as part of an initiative 49 00:03:32,580 --> 00:03:35,580 to put some of that good spicy personality back 50 00:03:35,580 --> 00:03:40,540 into the chatbot that they took out. In a tweet, Altman says that open AI has been pretty restrictive 51 00:03:40,540 --> 00:03:43,620 with ChatGPT's personality and conversation topics 52 00:03:43,620 --> 00:03:47,320 for fear of putting folks with mental health issues at risk. 53 00:03:47,320 --> 00:03:50,420 But that made it less fun to use for many users 54 00:03:50,420 --> 00:03:53,540 with absolutely no mental health problems at all. 55 00:03:53,540 --> 00:03:57,740 You know, normal people, they figured it all out. 56 00:03:57,740 --> 00:04:03,260 So open AI is loosening those restrictions with help from a newly formed expert council 57 00:04:03,260 --> 00:04:07,140 of well-being and AI, whose first decree is to say, 58 00:04:07,140 --> 00:04:11,420 smart is okay for verified adults. 59 00:04:11,420 --> 00:04:15,500 It is the will of the council. This is a bit of an about face from Altman 60 00:04:15,500 --> 00:04:20,740 who had previously made jokes at the expense of the sexy anime slot being generated by Grok. 61 00:04:20,740 --> 00:04:26,540 But I guess the people want what the people want and they really want to talk dirty with their chatbots. 62 00:04:26,540 --> 00:04:31,060 I'm guessing this is going to be a big blow to people fighting against AI slop on the internet 63 00:04:31,060 --> 00:04:35,740 because it's about to get a whole lot sloppier. All that said, even though you're gonna be 64 00:04:35,740 --> 00:04:40,700 sexting your chatbots soon, you can forget about marrying it at least in Ohio 65 00:04:40,700 --> 00:04:44,500 where lawmaker Fadius Claggett, 66 00:04:44,500 --> 00:04:48,660 yes, has put forward House Bill 469 67 00:04:48,700 --> 00:04:54,620 to stop humans from marrying AI and to stop AI from acquiring personhood. 68 00:04:55,700 --> 00:05:00,180 Like they're stealing it from a bank. We got the personhood. 69 00:05:00,180 --> 00:05:05,980 Run, Claggett says that he wants to make sure we always have a human in charge of the technology, 70 00:05:05,980 --> 00:05:11,620 not the other way around. I'll tell you what, I'd rather have a Claggett in charge 71 00:05:11,620 --> 00:05:18,420 than a clanker. That's not how they sound in Ohio, so I'm sorry. And if I'm fixin' to stay dry, I'd rather use our sponsor. 72 00:05:18,420 --> 00:05:23,980 You know, before the quick bits started hanging around here, they were an incredible break dancer down in LA. 73 00:05:23,980 --> 00:05:26,980 Pop and locking, that would blow your mind. 74 00:05:26,980 --> 00:05:30,100 Ask JC Chasses? 75 00:05:30,100 --> 00:05:33,300 Windows 10 was issued its last major update 76 00:05:33,300 --> 00:05:37,760 on October 14th, the operating system's last day of official support. 77 00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:40,820 It's been sent to drift, like a Viking funeral ship. 78 00:05:40,820 --> 00:05:46,900 Okay, we got a quote here. Cattle die and kinsmen die, and so one dies one's self. 79 00:05:47,500 --> 00:05:52,500 But a noble name will never die if good renown one gets. 80 00:05:52,900 --> 00:05:57,500 That doesn't, is that supposed to rhyme? But wait, hold your Norse funeral poetry. 81 00:05:57,500 --> 00:06:02,700 You may remember that there are a number of ways to get a free year of security updates for Windows 10, 82 00:06:02,700 --> 00:06:07,100 including simply signing into Windows with your Microsoft account and syncing your settings. 83 00:06:07,100 --> 00:06:11,100 Ragnarok isn't here after all. I got all emotional for nothing. 84 00:06:11,100 --> 00:06:16,280 You know what is here? NVIDIA's DGX Spark personal AI supercomputer. 85 00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:21,080 Team Green's first product to feature its homegrown GB10 SoC. 86 00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:27,000 It's such a big deal that NVIDIA bumped the starting price up to $4,000 after announcing that it would start 87 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:33,640 at $3,000 earlier this year. Still, Jensen hand delivered a Spark to Elon Musk, 88 00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:37,180 and you can't put a price on that additional leather jacket cool factor. 89 00:06:38,200 --> 00:06:41,240 Well, I guess you can. It's $1,000. 90 00:06:41,240 --> 00:06:44,320 Google's Pixel 10 Pro Fold is blowing up 91 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:48,560 for all the wrong reasons. In a YouTube video from JerryRigEverything, 92 00:06:48,560 --> 00:06:52,360 aka Zach Nelson, the Pixel 10 Pro Fold's battery 93 00:06:52,360 --> 00:06:57,960 appears to expand, overheat, and emit a bunch of smoke during the bend test, 94 00:06:57,960 --> 00:07:02,320 eventually setting off a fire alarm. While the bend test is pretty extreme 95 00:07:02,320 --> 00:07:06,920 and puts an unusual amount of stress on the phone, Nelson does know that he's been doing this test 96 00:07:06,920 --> 00:07:10,040 for a decade, and he has never seen a phone explode 97 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:13,680 like this before. I guess you could say the Pixel 10 Pro Fold 98 00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:17,380 is the hot new phone, but not in the way Google wanted. 99 00:07:17,380 --> 00:07:20,500 Ooh, got him again. Two in a row. 100 00:07:20,500 --> 00:07:24,300 Andruil, the military tech company created by Palmer Lucky, 101 00:07:24,300 --> 00:07:27,740 the original founder of Oculus, has teamed up with Meta to launch 102 00:07:27,740 --> 00:07:32,780 the Eagle Eye military helmet as part of Lucky's mission to turn warfighters 103 00:07:32,780 --> 00:07:36,780 into techno mansors. The Eagle Eye uses a mixed reality system 104 00:07:36,780 --> 00:07:41,000 built into a soldier's helmet as a sort of AI partner in their display, 105 00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:44,660 aiding in mission planning, enhanced perception of a battlefield, 106 00:07:44,660 --> 00:07:47,980 and presumably, writing army-approved erotica. 107 00:07:47,980 --> 00:07:52,660 Now that all sounds awesome, but I'm not sure how badass military guys will feel 108 00:07:52,660 --> 00:07:56,740 about wearing what Gizmodo calls tactical cat ears 109 00:07:56,740 --> 00:08:00,260 and taking part in the uwuification of war. 110 00:08:00,260 --> 00:08:03,860 Alrighty, thanks for watching. That's plenty of tech news for one day. 111 00:08:03,860 --> 00:08:08,940 If you want more, come back on Friday. Now, how about I show you some of these freaky dance moves? 112 00:08:10,300 --> 00:08:14,380 Incredible. Plie! Beautiful. What is a chasse? 113 00:08:14,420 --> 00:08:18,140 I don't know. Pirouette! 114 00:08:18,140 --> 00:08:19,140 I did it now.