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I've surrendered my humanity and have transcended mortal form. I am no longer

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a man, but a conduit of tech news. Feast

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upon tech news. >> Android developers are revoling against

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Google's upcoming sideloading restrictions, organizing a campaign at

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keepandroid open.org. The fight is over

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Android tightening rules around the installation of unverified or sideloaded

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apps, specifically regarding developer verification and app installation.

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Google's developer verification program, which was announced last year, will

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require anyone distributing apps outside of the Play Store to register their

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identity, upload signing keys, and pay a $25 fee, which was then followed by

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Google's unveiling of advanced flow to let power users still install unverified

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apps. The flow requires the user to go through a cumbersome one-time approval

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process, then wait 24 hours before sideloading anything. According to

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Android, these changes are designed to thwart high-pressured scam tactics that

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cyber criminals often use. Detractors, however, are calling it a rugpull on

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Android's original promise as an open alternative to Apple's iOS. And FDroid,

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which is the open- source alternative to the Play Store, says the whole framework

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could kill the open- source marketplace. Cyber security firms, on the other hand,

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are calling it a reasonable compromise that protects users from social

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engineering attacks. What's next? two-factor authentication to change your

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ringtone. YouTube is doubling down on AI with Ask YouTube, a conversational

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search feature currently in testing because scrolling through search results

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obviously takes a ton of work. My fingers are hurting. I don't know about yours. The feature delivers a

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step-by-step mix of text, videos, and shorts directly addressing your search

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query. The demo explores how you can ask YouTube for help planning a 3-day road

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trip from San Fran to Santa Barbara. and it will actually give you a whole

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multimedia itinerary. You could then ask a follow-up question like, "Where can I

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find good coffee?" It's currently only available to US-based YouTube premium

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subscribers who are over the age of 18, but they're working on expanding it to

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nonpremium users in the future. Don't expect total accuracy, though. Uh, a

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Verge writer actually asked about the Steam Controller, and the AI confidently

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claimed that the device has no joysticks, which would be a surprise to

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the videos it pulled up since they all clearly show a joystick. Maybe ask

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YouTube should have Oh, you know what? They should have asked YouTube. The US

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Department of Commerce has ordered US companies to halt shipments to Chinese

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chipmaker Huahong as it's been helping the blacklisted Huawei produce AI chips.

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This move extends the ongoing chip-based game of will they, won't they, that the

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US and China have been playing. This whole thing started in November when the

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US blocked NVIDIA from selling AI chips to China. Then in January, it

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conditionally approved the H200 sales and slapped a 25% tariff on them. Then

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China blocked the imports of those chips. Then the US capped how many chips

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it would expect. Then in March, everyone chilled out and came back into an

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agreement. Then last week, commerce secretary and world's oiliest man Howard

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Lutnik said China was blocking ship reports.

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So yesterday he shut it all down again. Couldn't I have just said that part

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instead of Okay.

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These interruptions, however, don't seem to be slowing China's AI progress as it

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just announced its first CPUon exascale

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supercomput which it claims is made with zero foreign components. Who knows

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what'll happen next in this Ross and Rachel style relationship that the US

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and China are in. My money, I think, is on them having a kid in season 8 that

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the writers forget about by the finale. Luckily, our writers didn't forget to

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quick bits. >> I I kind of imagined the editor putting lightning, but now they're probably not

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going to put lightning, so it's going to look even cringier. Google's upcoming

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Tensor G6 chip for the Pixel 11.

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Damn. Google's upcoming Tensor G6 chip for the Pixel 11 might have a shiny new

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CPU, but an embarrassing old GPU. According to a new leak, a redacted spec

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image on the Mystic Leaks Telegram channel points to ARM's latest C1 CPU

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cores paired with a Power VR graphics chip from 2021. Potentially a trade-off

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for thermals and AI efficiency, meaning the Pixel 11 should fly through Gemini

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prompts, but tap out the second you open Genchin Impact. A Virginia bank robber

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is trying to beat his conviction by arguing in the Supreme Court that

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geoence warrants are unconstitutional. Geoffence warrants let cops draw a

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border around a crime scene and demand data from Google on every phone inside

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of it. Critics say they're invasive and the bank robber is claiming it's

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violated his Fourth Amendment rights, which since I've never actually read the

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Constitution myself, I'm guessing is the right to rob a bank. Google Translate is

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celebrating its 20th birthday by rolling out AI pronunciation practice on Android

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for US and Indian users in English, Spanish, and Hindi. talking to your

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phone and the AI gives you instant feedback on which sounds you butchered

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and how to fix them. That would have been really helpful in the last freaking

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prompt I had. Thank you. Chinese chipmaker. Haha.

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It works very similar to Dolingo. Now, I

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was going to make a joke about the Dualingo owl, but I got to tell you

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folks that owl frightens me. He frightens me deeply, and I will not be

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doing that. Please don't hurt me. A new paper from

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Imperial College London, Stanford, and the Internet Archive found that 35% of

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new websites since Jack GBPT's launch are AI generated or at least AI assisted

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with 17.6% being fully AI written. Surprisingly,

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the AI flood is actually making everything semantically sy and 107% more

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positively toned. Here I was worried about AI Skynet. Turns out AI just wants

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to cosplay as an overly enthusiastic CEO at a corporate retreat, which is somehow

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worse. And OpenAI's open- source codeex system prompt reveals an oddly specific

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rule regarding creatures. Never talk about goblins, gremlins, raccoons,

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trolls, ogres, and pigeons, unless absolutely relevant, which apparently

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was a big issue. A Google employee posted logs of his chat GPT 5.5 powered

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OpenClaw agent repeatedly using the word goblin multiple times in a single day.

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I'm laughing cuz this is my first time reading this. This is really funny. Sorry. The same prompt also tells Codeex

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it has a vivid inner life, one that clearly involves pretending to be Norman

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Osborne. Oh, dear God, I'm back. Oh, thank God it's over. This vessel may not

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rest yet, but you, dear viewer, may

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return Friday for more tech news.