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Welcome to day one of our CES 2026 coverage. You can look forward to

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getting CES tech news five days in a row instead of the regular three with

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special guests in the midweek because in 2026 what happens in Vegas ends up on

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the internet. NVIDIA CEO Jensen Hong took to the stage

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at CES in his trademark leather jacket and basically said the future's robots

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and we're building all of it. NVIDIA is building the robots and also the chips

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those robots run on and also the software and also the simulation tools.

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It's NVIDIA's all the way down. The headline is the Reuben platform. Their

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nextg AI supercomputer with six integrated chips, including the Vera CPU

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with 88 custom cores and a Reuben GPU packing 336 billion transistors, which

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is more. NVIDIA claims five times the performance of Blackwell and a 10x

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reduction in inference costs. They also unveiled Alpameo, which I thought was an

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expensive mayonnaise brand, but it's apparently the first reasoning AI for

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autonomous vehicles. Jensen showed a car navigating San Francisco supposedly

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thinking through decisions in real time, which is more than I can say I do.

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NVIDIA announced that they're open sourcing it, which either means they're

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very confident or they want everyone else to do the bug testing. Talk about

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lowering inference costs. But the real showstopper was when Star Wars BDX

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droids walked on stage the exact same way they did last year, but this time

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they were fully autonomous, trained on NVIDIA's Cosmos AI models. Partners like

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Boston Dynamics, LG, and Caterpillar showed off robots running NVIDIA

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silicon, which sounds impressive until you realize NVIDIA's entire business

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model is now we sell the shovels in every gold rush simultaneously.

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Autonomous cars, NVIDIA chips, humanoid robots, NVIDIA chips, AI data centers,

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believe it or not, NVIDIA chips. I'm sure nothing can possibly go wrong with

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a single company building the infrastructure that's propping up the

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entirety of the US economy. Love it or hate it, though, at this point, one

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thing's for sure. Jensen is building the cyberpunk dystopia that matches his

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cooled leather jackets. I guess that's that's Mad Max. One big desert. There's

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a phone with a robot arm now. Honor unveiled the robot phone. A device with

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an actual threeaxis gimbal camera that pops out of the back like something out

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of a Transformers movie. The camera can rotate 360°, track your face

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autonomously, and basically turn your phone into a DJI Osmo that also calls

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your mother or doesn't call her. Sorry.

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Honors calling it part of their10 billion dollar alpha plan for AI

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devices, which sounds like something a Transformers villain would announce

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before Shia Labou shoved the All Spark into its shiny metal ass. No pricing yet

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and it launches at Mobile World Congress in March, which isn't CES and we care

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about CES. But if you've ever thought, "My phone needs more moving parts," then

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this is your moment. And if you want the exact opposite, Clicks unveiled the

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Communicator, a full Blackberry style phone with a 4-in AMOLED display,

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minimalist UI, physical quarterty keyboard, headphone jack by Gustla, and

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a fingerprint sensor in the space bar. It's $4.99, runs Android 16, and is

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marketed as the best second phone on the planet because apparently one phone

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isn't enough anxiety. Here's some more. Haning Toeal showed off what they're

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calling the world's thinnest tablet. so thin it makes the iPad Pro look like

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Kirby after inhaling an entire Panda Express. TCL brought back max ink mode

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on their next page Paper 70 Pro to allow you to experience what it would be like

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if the Pagemaster designed a smartphone. And Solver announced customizable

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magnetic haptic buttons for phones, allowing you to bind whatever action or

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string of actions you want, like quickly launching your I'm pooping at work timer

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and making a new entry in your how much money do I make while pooping at work

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spreadsheet. I'm up to 85 BUCKS IN 2026 ALREADY, BABY. Samsung brought some of

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the literally biggest news at CS, showing off their massive 130in R95H

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microRGB TV. Unfortunately, did they didn't provide pricing or availability

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details for this wide boy. So, who knows when we'll get to see Linus try to plug

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it into his house. But not only did Samsung unveil a big ass TV, they also

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revealed a brightass TV with their 77in

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Cutie OLED panel capable of reaching up to 4500 nits. Samsung touts it as the

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world's brightest self- emissive display. Naturally, it's not tech in

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2026 without AI in the mix. So, Samsung also revealed some new TV AI based

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software. For example, AI Sound Controller Pro is going to let you mess

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with the volume of background noise, including music and crowds to provide

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you with a personalized listening experience. As a purist, I hate this.

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Not to be left out of the CES fund, LG previewed their 2026 OLED TV lineup,

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featuring the new G6 that boasts a more advanced tandem OLED panel with about

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20% higher brightness and greatly reduced reflections. And the C6 series,

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everyone's favorite, now upgraded to tandem OLED, big ass TVs, bright ass

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TVs, and even flat ass TVs. LG also

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showed off its ultra thin wallpaper OLED design with the LG OLED Evo W6, a

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wireless 9mm thin OLED TV that sits flush to the wall and pairs with a

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separate zero connect box. Finally, Amazon said, "We like flat TV, too." And

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debuted the Ember Artline TV, a thin art

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focused 4K lifestyle TV with a matte screen, customizable frames, and Amazon

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photos integration that seems ready to directly compete with Samsung's Frame

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TVs. Thank god cuz those they stink. You know, I've said it. Plus, Amazon is

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kicking off 2026 with a major redesign of Fire TV's interface and mobile app

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that's meant to be cleaner, faster, and easier to navigate. Now, let me usher

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you to our sponsor, SY Strive. James

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Strive, international man of mystery. In my line of work, staying connected is

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across borders without the hassle of swapping SIM cards when I land. Whether

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connected in over 200 destinations while assassinating roaming thieves. Yeah, SY

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would be great for anyone with a mission at CS 2026 in Las Vegas. Plus, I never

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blow my cover with suspect Sim sellers. With SY, I'm connected the moment I

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We like to have fun here. The Quick Bits are angry they didn't get to go to Vegas

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with the crew, but they keep it professional. They showed up today

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focused and on task. By golly, Riley raised them right. Western Digital's WD

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Blue and WD Black SSD branding is officially dead with SanDisk replacing

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them with a unified SanDisk Optimus lineup. The new range introduces three

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clear performance tiers: Optimus, Optimus GX, and Optimus GX Pro to better

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differentiate mainstream gaming and high-end NVMe SSDs. I think I speak on

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behalf of everyone when I demand to know if these drives can transform into a

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truck or gorilla. If they can't, what are you even doing, SanDisk? More

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companies are reacting to rising RAM prices. In an interview with Reuters,

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Samsung co-CEO TM Row said that this

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situation is unprecedented and no company is immune to its impact. Row

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didn't dismiss the possibility of increasing product prices, noting that

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some effect was inevitable. Outside of CES, that inevitable impact is already

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here with Taiwanese retailers already raising laptop prices by roughly 15 to

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20% following ASUS's announcement of higher notebook and gaming PC prices

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starting January 5th. That's today.

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To be clear, we're not just talking about Asus. Laptops from Acer, HP, Dell,

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MSI, and Gigabyte have all seen price increases. At least, Taiwanese retailers

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aren't copying Corsair, who sparked backlash by cancelling confirmed orders

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for DDR5 RAM kits due to a pricing

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mistake and lack of stock, but then relisted them at much higher prices

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before offering apology coupons that were already expired. High performance

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RAM, terrible customer service. AI is everywhere at CES 2026 with a ton of

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stuff leaving us asking why is this even a thing. First and almost certainly most

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importantly, Amazon's Alexa Plus finally went public in early access. But AI's

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also showing up in Bosch coffee machines. Samsung teased its wild AI

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OLED cassette player and turntable, blissfully bringing AI into a scene

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usually occupied by people trying not to deal with AI. GE unveiled its smartest

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fridge ever [laughter] with a built-in barcode scanner for

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effortless grocery shopping. And AI even snuck into an ice cube machine. We're

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reaching a rule 34- like moment here. If something exists, there's a version of

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it with AI built in. The shareholders are titillated. The PR nightmare

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continues for XAI as multiple countries are now investigating the organization

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in the aftermath of Grock generating sexually explicit images of women and

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minors. France, Malaysia, and India have all either opened investigations or

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issued orders to the company after Grock was caught generating CSAM. [music] X's

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response, it allowed Grock to issue a user prompted heartfelt apology from the

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Grock account, which was somewhat undercut by the fact that it had also

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issued a user prompted statement that it was absolutely not sorry, telling users

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that it's revolutionizing tech, not babysitting sensitivities. India gave X

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72 hours to fix it or lose legal immunity from liability for user

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generated content. Meaning X would be legally liable for all the content

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people post on the platform, which could result in Elon Musk getting sued by

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Nintendo over all the Super Mario Brothers fan art I posted back in high

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school. A lot of chemicals in my body back then. Microsoft has quietly killed

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phone activation for Windows and Office, forcing everyone into online only

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activation tied to a Microsoft account.

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We're done here, boys. The support site still lists phone activation as an

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option, but if you call the number, you'll get a message saying support for

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product activation has moved online, as YouTuber Ben Kleinberg discovered. So,

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if you're trying to activate Windows on an old machine without the internet,

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your offline alternative, according to Microsoft, is now going online. I know

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people say this every year, but this might actually be the year of the Linux

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desktop. Man, all this talk of Linux in Vegas has me in a gambling mood. I'm

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hitting the casino. Don't forget to come back tomorrow for even more CES

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coverage. That's right, five sites of tech news, BABY. JESUS. LINE THEM UP.