Shakespeare and I both love talking about news. What news? What news? In
this uh tottering state. Or though it be
honest, it is never good to bring bad news. Ha, great stuff. But unlike the
Bard's work, Tech News doesn't come in pentameter.
Sorry to disappoint you. Windows 11's newest update is bringing along a brand
new start menu that actually looks finished. The redesign combines pinned
apps and all apps into one scrollable
view with new options including category, grid, or list. And you can
finally hide that cursed recommended
section. Almost a literal curse. Like why? The updates rolling out gradually
over the next few weeks. But unlike Windows Millennium Edition, installing
this one won't make you pray for a time traveler to eliminate it from existence.
What I may pray for the elimination of is Microsoft's new marketing campaign
for their C-pilot AI assistant, which involves recruiting social media
influencers to convince people that Copilot is cool. This will work because
nothing says trustworthy productivity tools like Tik Tockers explaining how
they use AI to teach them Excel formulas between skincare routines. Are they
actually doing that? And just to top it off, they are also testing Windows 11
26H1, the next major version of Windows,
which will reportedly be focused on better ARM processor support instead of
new features. So, we'll be paying for improvements to Windows on ARM by losing
improvements to Windows in general. Um, so yeah, new look, new marketing
strategy, new hardware support, same indecipherable tactics. I think
Microsoft may be entering its influencer era. What's next? Mo's only fans. You're
like, who's Mo exactly? Leaked benchmarks for AMD's unannounced Ryzen 7
9700 X3D CPU have proven to be fake. On
Reddit, user a Canadian boy explained that basically he and his friends
altered what his system reported for a CPU, taking an overclocked 9700X and
renaming it to 9700X 3D before running
it through Passmark. I am still
processing the fact that Canadians would just go on the internet and tell lies.
That's not At least they came clean about it in true Canadian fashion.
Anyway, those benchmarks were then spotted and written about by tech news
outlets. And as pointed out on Reddit, this is a good example of why fans and
tech journalists shouldn't trust one-off online benchmarks. If you want a story
about an unreleased AMD CPU that you can put a bit more faith in, MicroEnter is
already selling a pre-built gaming PC featuring the unreleased Ryzen 5
7500X3D. The build is $100 less than a similar PC
with the officially released Ryzen 5 7600X3D with the only real difference
being a slight clock speed drop. If Microenter makes a Reddit post admitting
they faked those pre-built PC listings with their buddies on the weekend, I am
going to be livid. This happens to me all the time. Disneyowned channels have
gone dark on YouTube TV as the two sides
debate terms for a new content distribution contract. Google has
claimed that Disney is attempting to increase prices for users of Google's
live TV over the internet service, while Disney asserts that Google is pursuing
special treatment and below market pricing. It's not fair. [laughter] In
the midst of the heated battle between two greedy, gargantuan companies, Disney
streamed College Game Day for free on Twitter, which seems smart cuz college
football fans are intense. And surveys say YouTube TV subscribers are already
becoming increasingly irate over the blackout. Ah, yes. The age-old solution
of throwing money at your problems.
[snorts] >> That solved nothing. >> Don't worry about it.
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our link below. In a Midsummer Nights Dream, Puck says
he can put a girdle around the Earth in 40 minutes.
The quick bits can do it way faster, which is impressive, but does nothing to
explain why we're putting girdles on things. SanDisk is reportedly hiking
flash memory prices by up to 50% as AI
demand sends nan costs skyrocketing, and
manufacturers cash in on the craze. Suppliers like Transcend and InnoDisk
are pausing shipments to rework pricing while consumers brace for pricier SSDs
and memory cards. So, if you were eyeing that 4 TBTE drive for your Steam
library, good luck. At this rate, backing up your files won't be about
data safety. It'll be about diversifying
your investment portfolio. More like
a group of US lawyers have documented 509 cases of AI misuse in court filings,
including fabricated citations and fake cases straight out of Chat GBT's
imagination, which in a way is all of our imagination when you really think
about it. >> Yeah, >> Reddit.
>> Reddit, which makes me ask how any of that is allowed. Well, turns out that
judges and bar associations allow AI tools in legal work, provided that the
user takes responsibility for what they produce, which is great because nothing
says justice like your attorney blaming co-pilot for contempt of court.
Contempt, that's even worse. The UK's National Cyber Security Center is
probing whether Chinese-made UN electric
buses on British roads can be remotely disabled after Norway parked one in a
mine and discovered that some models could in theory be shut down remotely by
Utah. Cyber security fears are an ongoing conversation with modern
vehicles being able to receive remote updates, but remote shutdown is
definitely a newer concern. The next speed movie is going to be nuts. Instead
of trying to keep a bus from slowing down, Kean is going to be paying a Chinese business a ransom to get the bus
to move. Gutjangling Thrills. >> Whoa. Listen, you got to start that bus.
>> And Death Stranding 2's latest collab is
somehow entirely real. Cojima Productions and DNS are working on a
limited run of real exoskeletons based
on the in-game counterparts. Designed with Yoji Shinkawa, the Z1 Exoskeleton
Pro Death Stranding 2 Edition boosts your walking power by 50%. Tracks
battery life through special lights from the game and comes out just in time for
Christmas, blurring the line between cosplay and physiootherapy. Do they have
Christmas in Death Stranding? Ghost Christmas. I think Kajjima may have
taken the Walking Simulator memes a little too seriously and decided to give
us some real life DLC. See, I think if I was wearing this exoskeleton, I could
have beaten Sammy in that race.
We got to get this thing in. Shakespeare's a Henry V 6th was the real
life DLC for Henry V, but our rebels now
are ended. So, come back on Wednesday for more tech news and probably some
work for my second favorite storyteller, Michael Bay. That's a lie.