Today we're doing a blue screen of death speedrun competition.
It used to be blue enough, but now it's black because someone at Microsoft apparently needed to be paid stills.
But the acronym still works. We'll be judging it on two categories. Firstly, the speed, and secondly,
just how much style they have while doing it. So we have four contestants today.
First one, if he's here. Eli? Oh.
Hi. You can tell me if it's you. Oh, first off.
Wait, is it blue or is it black? It's black. But who are you screen of death?
You're supposed to make the computer go black and blue.
Yes. I brought a secret tool.
Five out of five, yeah. All right, Eli, are you ready? Yes, sir.
All right, three, two, one, go. What the?
You plugging something? Yes, sir. I didn't say I was illegal. The only rule is you can't break the computer,
like physically break it. What is he doing? He opened the drive.
He launched. Why isn't it working? Oh, no.
Performance anxiety. Oh, no. What a twist.
This is a help file. No, that's OK. That's fine.
I have a backup plan. Something's not working. He's pivoting. The CMD?
He's pivoting. This is good. Shows ingenuity. Done.
Done? Oh. OK. My primary plan didn't work.
I had to pivot to my backup plan. Critical process died.
Wow, I like the backup plan. This is why you always copy and paste things
into an administrator command prompt from the internet.
No, god. I actually was, I did check to make sure
we were disconnected from the internet, because the tool that I was trying to run,
I actually didn't know what it would do. If it would install a virus, it was literally
called Start Blue Screen. You just downloaded a random one?
I just downloaded it from a website. And the website I'm pretty sure was, like,
InitiateBlueScreen.com or something like that. Is this computer connected to the internet?
No, it's not. We're good. We're not going to infect it. That could have been a virus.
What the heck are you doing? I tried running it on my work computer, and our threat locker caught it.
That's good. To our IT department, I'm sorry. I don't know why it didn't work.
It's telling me you must specify five command line parameters in order to initiate a blue screen of death.
You had to write your rainbow. So let you know, you finish it in 34 seconds.
New record. That's for you, honey. No one got that joke.
That's fine. I thought it was funny. I gave you a solid three. Out of what?
Out of five. Oh, thank god. Out of, that's 10.
You had 10 from all three of us. Three and a half because your initial method failed,
but the ingenuity, the wherewithal,
to be like, no, OK, I can pivot. I can make something, you know? I had at least two backup plans,
and I'm glad that I had that. It saved me in the end. Two backup plans.
What was the other one? It was to connect it to the internet and try redialing another program.
Just to flip the table and run out. Well, I was like, can we move a stick of RAM out?
Why did you give Eli 3.5? Same sort of idea.
I liked the ingenuity and coming prepared,
but at the same time, first one didn't work. Understandable.
I'm a vibes guy, so I just felt like a three today. What the hell does that mean?
Why is this based on vibes? I did the challenge. Yeah, but then, you know.
That's just who Sammy is. It didn't feel like a four. The best part is that this is not a bit.
This is actually just Sammy. I am going to be so curious if you give anyone else a four
or five what that is. I feel like I'm being pressured to give you a four.
You should, yeah. But I don't follow the pressure. Sammy, you should give him a four.
I'm not giving him a... Let's have our new writer, Danny, come on stage today.
Come on, Danny. Oh, Danny boy. Come on, then.
All right, Danny, do you want that camera there? You want to shoot yourself to the camera?
Because this is your first camera appearance from what I've heard. Yeah, I had a very brief cameo.
Oh, nice. Hi, I'm Danny. New writer.
Woo! What am I doing? You're making the computer blue, uh, B-Sod.
Uh, is this being timed? Yeah.
Holy shit. Did no reader think I sent them? I sent everybody with...
We're busy, Sammy. All right, ready? Yes.
Three, two, one, go. I'll try the easy way first.
Okay. The easy way. What's the easy way? Are you shutting it down?
I mean, it is a black screen if he shuts it down. I love how different this feels than Elijah's already.
Why? What's different about it? He's just kind of like, well, I'm going to try the first thing first and...
Oh, PowerShell? Elijah was like... PowerShell?
What's PowerShell? It's where you go and do powerful things.
PowerShell, that's my Pokemon's favorite move. Pass, kill?
Pass, kill? What did I say? Is that pass, kill?
Yeah, no, it's pass, kill. This is, this is... Pressure.
Looking familiar. Pressure, he says. Oh, wait, the wrong one!
Does he... No, no, wait, he was pass manager now?
Wait, that's not gonna do a pass manager. Wait, what do you mean?
What do you do in pass manager? You can do anything in there. Manage tasks.
Oh, what's going on? Pass the manager. Oh, don't want all this. Oh, you probably don't want to show that on screen.
Oh, okay. I don't know, I don't know. Wait, you can blur it? You can blur it after?
Oh, Daniel, I'll keep it real with you. It's been a minute and 10 seconds.
Pass, kill? What?
It's been a minute and 10 seconds. What? What's happening? Am I doing it right?
I can't read it from the screen. This is my favorite. Something host.
Oh, no, it's not found, though. Danny, Danny's like... Something host is not found. Oh, I spelt it wrong.
Oh, no, oh. He's going for SBC host. He's going to kill the SBC host.
What's SBC host? Not the SBC host! All right.
It's not blue. Oh, I don't want to be mean. I can be mean.
No. Why do you want to go first? You know, I'm giving you a three.
Danny? Three out of five. Three out of five. Three out of five.
Because I, you know, at the end of the day, you did blue screen or black screen it.
So what are you gonna, like what? I'm gonna give him less than a three.
He completed the task. You came in here to do what you came to do and...
I gave you a two.
Because the confidence wasn't there. But at the end of the day, you did get it done
and Riley's right. You deserve a little bit more. So let's add a...
Oh, I don't know how to do a five backwards.
Like that? Was that right? Two point five?
I'll take it. I thought he came in with like too much confidence
because Elijah came in here. He was like, oh, I'm gonna fail. You came in like, all right.
I didn't even know what I was doing when I got here. I still don't.
And I gave you a one.
Point nine eight six seven two. Which round up to two?
You know, you got the job done. You look a little flustered at the end, but you know what?
You still got it done. And I think that's a solid one point nine eight six seven two.
Which round up to two? So you got two. Thank you, Sammy. I appreciate all that.
I don't think he looked flustered for a second. He was just... I got more numbers probably than anybody else.
That's true. The best numbers.
The best numbers. We'll get the best numbers out there. Thank you, Danny.
Cheers. Mr. Jordan. Crawl them.
How you doing, buddy? I'm good, how are you guys?
So you just look at the camera into yourself and then...
Sorry? You look at the camera.
I'm Jordan. I'm a writer. You've all seen him before. Let's just do this.
All right. Are you ready, Jordan? Yep. Three, two, one, go.
Okay. What is he doing? Finder.
Finder. Oh, finder. This is different now. Explorer.
What is he doing? What are you typing? Window? Windar?
Windar. What's windar? Oh, windar. System 32?
Oh, no. Oh, oh, no. Oh, oh, oh.
You don't have permissions, dude. I have a feeling things are gonna start going missing
on this one. You don't have permissions for that? I do now.
Wait, he's making a folder? Yeah. What is he making a folder?
He's hacking the planet. I don't know what the folder says. I thought it was gonna delete system 32.
Oh. Oh, okay. Okay, this is interesting.
We'll see if this still works. For me, you're a 3R10 right now for style.
This is crazy. 3R10? Yeah, for me personally. I thought it was not a five.
A 3R5, sorry. Oh, okay. Changing your scrolling system.
I don't, I'm just randomly here or what? I'm just lost in life. Sammy, Sammy, Sammy.
Wait, what's happening? This is taking a while, Jordan. This is taking a while, but. It's rebooting.
It's a black screen, but it's not of death. I'm not getting, oh.
Oh. We got Gigabyte back, so we're starting. That wasn't a blue screen.
The computer being slow is not my fault. I'm like, no.
That's a risk, yeah. So it's gonna do. It's not me, I didn't mean it. You think it's gonna go from this to a B-Sod?
Yeah. Oh, there it is.
Yeah. We'll see the second one. Oh, another one.
It's a lead. Two B-Sods? Either the two B-Sods.
All right, config which? Config list failed. Okay. He besotted it twice.
Mastod squared. That's only theories. No signal. No signal.
I'm ready to give my rating here. So it's automatic repair. You, man, you really.
You broke it. You broke it. You f*** this up. System to diagnose your PC.
This is, oh my. Man, he freaking nuked this thing.
I'm looking at, this is crazy. Oh my God. And we got the blue one.
Oh, you got the blue as well. Yo. They kept the automatic repair blue.
What? What's happening? Let's see if it works. This is great.
It's gonna be like a 1.3 or something B-S now. All right, Riley, you wanna start?
I mean, it's still going. The performance is still underway.
Is it gonna do it again? Yes. So why is it doing this? Basically, I've added something to the registry
that it can't be all with. Oh. Yeah. That's what I'm gonna have for the registry.
So if I put like the Among Us picture there and named it, what you named it,
bud.png, would it do the same thing? No.
Okay. Okay. Well, I'm ready. All right.
I'm giving this a five because five out of five. Cause I mean, what is the scale supposed to be
if this isn't a five? I mean, he black screened it, he blue screened it
and it's still ongoing as we're talking right now. This is the-
And we wouldn't have used a hammer so I was like, what else can I do, right? He's done every kind of screen you can do to a PC.
This is, I'm scared for my life to be frank.
Well done, Jordan. Yeah. Okay. I'm giving it a 4.8 just because I know how I would undo it.
But it's a persistent looping blue screen or black screen,
whatever you wanna call it. Whatever. So that's pretty darn good.
And now it's saying we'll restart for you, but it's not restarting.
It's like- If you can't even do it, we'll get a point, two points back. Interesting.
Later on, you try. I mean, Jordan, at that point you're just being a nuisance.
Fair enough. We need the PC over. All right. I'm no more hard drive.
I gave you a 4.967. All right.
But I rounded it up to a five. All right. So perfect five out of five for you.
Thank you very much. So that's a total- The vibes- Looks good.
Yeah. Thanks, Jordan. Thanks, Jordan. The vibes continue.
All right. And we're blading through the shoot actually. We have one final contestant here.
We have Tatiana from Creative Warehouse. Tatiana. Oh wait, wait, wait.
First, we gotta fix the computer first. Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. At first.
If Packrats can fix it in five minutes, I think Jordan loses half a point. Hey.
Well, Packrats, you can do it. This is a aura check, you know?
An aura check? Yeah. This looks like a spaceship. I'm not getting it up here though.
Oh. It looks like Doom. I never played Doom actually, but it looks like Doom.
Oh. This looks like 1980s.
This looks like 1980s. This looks like something you would use
back in your day. In the two years of the 80s that I was alive for?
But let me tell you, those were good years. Back in my day in the 80s.
Man, I missed the 80s.
Man, I missed the 90s. The three years I was alive.
A man could truly live then. And by a man, I mean a baby.
Okay, so what I've done here right now is I've started into the Windows installer,
and I'm gonna go and see if I can try and find the file that Jordan added.
Oh my God. Jordan, what the heck dude? Oh my God.
You should have told us. No, this is interesting though. I'm interested.
This is part of the saga. Pancrats is now part of the competition though.
It's just, he's in his own competition though. What is he typing, bro? This looks like a hack, you know, a matrix?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's hacking into the matrix. This is so great. I love that you're the one who organized this.
Why? Whoa, look what he's doing. Well, like, I don't know what he's doing.
He's like, he's like making the computer do stuff.
Okay, I think I got it.
So we're gonna reboot unplug my USB and see what happens.
It's been more of a mis-thing at this point, but. Really? I don't think so. No way.
Look at your timer. I didn't take the timer. Why are you laughing at it instead of just stopping it?
Jordan's sweating, bro. He's off camera. He's like, guys, oh gosh.
We're gonna have to reboot one more time because Windows failed to start too many times.
So it's doing the automatic repair thing.
Do a job, he did it too well. Well, he's not a camera, so this is my truth.
I can make whatever narrative I want to make. Jordan's now doing backflips off camera.
Elijah taught him. You know what this feels like? You know, have you heard of the Excel's
eSports World Championships? I like that. This doesn't, right now, that doesn't feel like that
because we're just kind of. No. Oh.
It's still, it's still worked. Okay, Jordan wins.
Jordan's put his middle finger out to everybody at us.
He said, F, y'all, I did it right. Let's introduce Tatiana to our next stage.
Tatiana, welcome. Hello, I'm Tatiana Devick.
The product developer at Creator Warehouse. I mainly work on raw materials.
Three, two, one, go.
Chrome. Chrome. Okay. There's no internet.
There's no, well, send me. Three, two, one, go.
Google Chrome. Chrome. Interesting.
Oh. She's, what? Blue script.
Shut up. That's why.
That's why. Now. Uh-oh.
Right click, right click on that. Right click on that. Open image in new tab.
No. No, no. Right click. No, I had any of this.
Down, open image. No, I was just saying.
Almost. Open image in new tab. Yeah.
That's the top one. And that's, yeah. And then, what? And then, and then F11.
F11? Yeah. Yeah. Good job.
Yeah. It's technically a blue screen.
Shockingly, you weren't the fastest. Swagger was there.
I had no swagger. I would be totally fine if he gave me zeros across the board.
What's your drawing? Huh? You have a drawing.
Don't worry about it. I'm giving you 2.5 because it's technically a blue screen.
There wasn't any hacking involved, but I have to admit, it is a blue screen.
And you know, and we had fun along the way. I gave Danny a three because he technically did it,
but it was like, he kind of stumbled his way there. Wait, I forget what I, yeah.
This is what I'm going with. I gave a 3.14 for Pi because it's out of the box thinking.
And I gave you, what does that have to do with Pi? Well, there's no boxes with Pi.
That's true, it just keeps going. I guess Pi comes in a box. Yeah.
Well, I was like, it's more distinct Pi. That's not a number, but I, oh,
it looks like a five this way now. Yeah. All right.
What's going on? Sammy. I gave you a 2.67.
Six seven. Rounding down, so you got two.
Rounding down? Rounding down, why? What is your rounding? There's no rhyme or reason.
Round down to the nearest two decibels, so you got two. He rounded everybody else up top.
Yeah. Well, you know, I can't give her a three because I gave Danny a three.
I gave Danny a two because I can't put Danny lower.
I just meet Danny again. But you know what? It's not the scores at the end of the day.
It's the blue screens we saw along the way.
Or black screens, as it were. But you were the second fastest. Hey, we got a blue screen.
Yeah, you got a blue screen. Bye, Tatiana. Bye.
Thank you so much. Eli was the fastest, so he gets additional eight points. Tatiana was the second fastest.
She gets additional six points. Jordan for Danny two.
Why wouldn't you just make it four, three, two, one?
Because I'm making sure the speed is valued more because at the end of the day, this is a speed run competition.
Oh, I see. Okay, so speed is the only thing that matters.
Speed is the most important. But then the style points could get you bump up points too.
You know, it's like Mario party. This is 20 points altogether.
Do you have a problem with me? I love you, Sammy. No.
3.5, Tatiana, I gave her two.
I gave Jordan a five. He's remembering all the things that he rounded up to,
which is pretty impressive. It's because he can't remember all the other numbers.
And Danny, I gave two. So, and what was your score?
So I gave Elijah 3.5, Tatiana 3.14,
so do with that what you want. Jordan, I gave him a 4.8, rounded up to five.
Danny, I gave a 2.5. Elijah, 3.5.
Oh, wow. Tatiana, 2.5. Jordan, yeah.
5. Okay, well, Jordan dominated. Danny, 3.
My inner Asian. Let me do the math here, about 15.
Elijah's real close to there, bud. Wait, does that mean I have an inner white guy
inside the outer white guy? Do I have an inner Asian to him?
That's six. All right, so right now Jordan dominated with 19.
You haven't done Elijah yet. I'm just, I'm making the anticipation happen.
It's called tension. Over tension is going like this right now.
I think you can see the Elijah's not gonna beat him.
You don't know that? Oh, but he got eight. Three, six, nine, 17, 18.5.
So, Eli lost by .5. Wow, okay. All right, yeah, that was tension.
He was pretty close. See, I was pretty close. He was up by .5.
Wow, master storyteller. Yeah. And then you know what,
Eli's crap was complaining about the .5 he lost. Who?
Eli's complaining, wasn't he? Was he? Yeah, because I only gave him 3.5.
I mean, he always is, but that's like, neither here nor there. And that's the video.
Congratulations to Jordan. And that's the video.
Congratulations to Jordan for winning. I have to go congratulate him.
Hi, Jordan. Hello. Congratulations, you won.
Here's a trophy. This is my trophy?
Yeah, you won by, with 19 points. 19.
Yeah. I'm getting like that. Congratulations. Thank you.
What? Paladin. So anyways, Jordan.