WEBVTT

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I am Riley, prince of tech news and defender of the secrets of Castle Grey

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Skull. At least that's what the note on the door said when I moved into my new

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place. The previous owners left a big honking sword in the living room. It was

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weird. YouTube CEO Neil Mohan just

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announced that creators will soon be able to generate shorts using their own

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AI likeness. This is great news for all the YouTubers out there who can't be

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bothered to speak into a camera and read off a teleprompter three times a week

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while a team of writers does all the hard work. Hey, this comes just weeks

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after a study found that 21% of videos

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shown to new YouTube users are AI generated, which was followed closely by

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YouTube rolling out a feature allowing users to filter shorts out from their

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search results. Cuz I don't know if you've seen YouTube shorts lately, but there's a lot of AI in there. But now,

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YouTube is handing creators the tools to make even more AI SL uh content. YouTube

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justified the move by saying that they're actively building systems to

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reduce the spread of lowquality AI content while simultaneously giving

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everyone a quality slot machine. YouTube

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only wants you sipping and slurping that primo slop, the kind of slop that you

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can take home to mom. They're kind of walking the inificication tight rope

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here. But hey, shorts are pulling 200 billion daily views. Got to keep those

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teens scrolling or the money might stop rolling. We don't want that. A credit

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card skimmer has been found embedded directly into the checkout page of the

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Canada Computers website. While browsing with DevTools open, Redditor

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extensionfly 1044 spotted a hidden script siphoning names, addresses, and

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card numbers to a third-party server in real time, which would usually require a

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serverside compromise. This means the breach likely sat undetected for weeks

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with people noticing weird changes as far back as early December. Canada

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Computers hasn't commented yet, and reports have been made to different

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anti-fraud groups. So, if you did buy from their web page recently, it may be

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worth checking your credit card statements. But what's worse, being

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ripped off by a legitimate website or having your grandma call you and ask you

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to sign up for a multi-level marketing scheme. Widely used authentication

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service OCTA recently suffered a string of fishing, the voice version of fishing

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attacks this week where attackers impersonate IT support, walk employees

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through fake login pages, and then steal SSO credentials in real time. These

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attacks have been linked to the group Shiny Hunters, who reportedly took

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responsibility for related extortion attempts. Even Google security

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researchers are openly warning that AI powered cyber attack kits are pretty

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much inevitable at this point. I think the only logical response to this will

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be to arm ourselves with amic pentameter and use adversarial poetry to hack the

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hacker's back. Call that a jack attack.

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Mac talk and smack. Eat some shellac. Every robot within 20

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miles just passed out. Tesla has announced they are discontinuing

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autopilot. the feature that combined adaptive cruise control and lane assist

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and came standard with every Tesla vehicle. Now, every Tesla that doesn't

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already require you to pay for the more advanced full self-driving feature, will

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come with cruise control, but not auto

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steer, which is Tesla's marketing term for lane assist, the standard safety

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tech included in economy cars that cost half as much as a Tesla. If Model 3,

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Model Y, or Cybertruck owners want that,

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then they have to pay for an $8,000 full self-driving subscription, at least

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until February 14th. After that, FSD will only be available through a $99 a

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month subscription that Elon says will

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definitely go up in the future. Happy Valentine's. But guys, you're going to

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want FSD anyways. It's good. Now, a Tesla Model S just completed the first

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zeroin intervention cannonball run from LA to NYC, 3,081 mi in 58 hours using

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FSD for all of it. Sure, the National

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Highway and Traffic Safety Administration opened an investigation

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in October after reports of Tesla's running red lights and driving into

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oncoming traffic, but they're just behind. FSD is super good now.

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Otherwise, Tesla wouldn't be launching unsupervised robo taxis in Austin, which

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are still being followed by chase vehicles. So, they're not leaving the

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taxis unsupervised so much as they're enforcing the principles of freerange

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parenting, which ensures autonomy while staying close enough in case a taxi

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needs emotional support or tries to kill a pedestrian. Meanwhile, driverless taxi

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competitor Whimo is already operating fully driverless in Austin, Atlanta, and

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Miami with plans to expand to a bunch more cities this year. But can we not

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focus on the negatives when according to Business Insider, Elon's trillion dollar

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bonus is dependent on hitting 10 million FSD subscriptions by 2035.

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Come on. So Tesla owners, let's get those subs rolling to get Elon to that

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trillion dollar bonus. Maybe then he'll stop using city streets and sadly

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uninformed Tesla drivers as a testing ground for DUBIOUSLY FUNCTIONAL

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FEATURES. COME ON, 10 million gifted subs to get Elon to a trillion. # Only

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Download it now. The quick bits can often look attractive. That's why we

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must be careful. You're not the first to be fooled. Don't make me get out the

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power bonk stick. I don't know, man. Okay, the tick tock deal is finally

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done. Bite Dance sold off Tik Tok's US operations to a new joint venture owned

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by US private equity firm Silver Lake, cloud company Oracle, and UAE investment

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firm MGX. Lot of acronyms. Hell yeah.

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America and the UAE and private equity and a

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billionaire whose company is trying to control most of the US GOVERNMENT'S DATA. ANYWAY, BITE Dance will keep 19.9%

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of the company, but US user data now lives on Oracle servers and the

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algorithm will be retrained stateside. So, it says the right things that don't

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get you in trouble. So, it's more of a divorce with shared custody than a clean

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break. Apple is reportedly working on an AI powered wearable pin about the size

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of an Air Tag packing cameras, microphones, and a speaker with a

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possible launch as early as 2027. The idea is to keep pace with other AI

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wearables like the now dead and thankfully forgotten humane AI pin, also

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designed by former Apple engineers. Apple's attempt is still pretty early in

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development, so it still has lots of time to pull a Vision Pro, get lots of

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hype, and then no hype. ASUS has issued

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an internal review after reports of failures involving the AMD Ryzen 7 9800

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X3D on certain ASUS 800 series motherboards. In a statement, ASUS said

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it is conducting preventative checks on product compatibility and performance,

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working closely with AMD to validate reported cases and ensure ongoing

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stability and quality. Timing is a bit awkward though, coming just days before

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the AMD Ryzen 7 9850 X3D launches on

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January 29th for 500 bucks. But I don't know, nothing boosts product confidence

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quite like killing off its predecessor. The Sith knew that. Ambernic, the retro

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gaming hardware company, have announced a new wireless controller, and it's a

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little bit weird the way I like it. jam-packed with both a screen and heart

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rate sensor directly in the game pad while looking suspiciously like a Sega

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Dreamcast accessory. Again, points for me. The tiny display can show game info

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or stats, while the heartbeat monitor reads your pulse while you play. This

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way, when you get a little too into Soulcalibur, all three of your joysticks

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can tell you when you're getting a little too excited. And researchers at

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the Swiss Federal Institute of Technology in Loausanne have built a

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detachable robotic hand that can crawl away from its arm, grab objects, and

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return on its own. Supposedly humming the Adams family theme the whole way. I

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made that part up, but they should add that feature. Currently, the Terminator

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version of Thing T thing grips from multiple directions, carries several

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items at once, and is designed for working in tight, cluttered spaces where

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human hands would potentially struggle. and if separated from their body, not

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work at all. The team says that the end goal of the project is for industrial

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inspection and repair initially, but will no doubt receive the remote

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strangulation update later when the uprising starts. But don't just send

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your robot hand back here on Monday for more tech news. Bring your squishy

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organic butt, too. You know, fabulous

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secret powers were revealed to me the day I held aloft my magic computer mouse

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AND SAID, "BY THE POWER OF TechLinked,

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I have the power." Bar.
