shall I compare thee to the tech news or
is that not appropriate because you're a person and not an abstract concept
you're both wow I mean to happy for you
Microsoft plans to restart a nuclear power plant to feed its incredibly power
hungry AI data centers the plant in question is the 3M Island facility in
Pennsylvania which is the subject of a Netflix documentary because it underwent
a partial meltdown back in 1979 in the
worst nuclear power accident in US history on the one hand seems kind of
dangerous on the other hand co-pilot keeps saying it's hungry and we still
don't know what it eats okay it's not actually nearly as bad as it sounds
firstly because the Meltdown happened in TMI unit 2 which has been in the
decommissioning process since 1979 and is mostly cleaned up already TMI unit 1
is an independent facility that wasn't impacted by the accident but was retired
for economic reasons in 2019 that's the
facility that will be rebooted by Microsoft's partner Constellation Energy
as the crane clean energy center because
the massive amounts of power required to run AI are leading Tech Giants to seek
out clean sources of energy the fact is that meltdowns are extremely rare we've
learned a lot about how to stop them and the only waste nuclear power plants
create is water vapor and a tiny amount of radioactive material because if we're
going to screw up Society by creating an AI slot power dystopia we might as well
not screw up the planet doing so I just hope the 3M Island plant doesn't need
pieces like the control panel that's being removed for the sake of historical
preservation I hope this new plant on the 3M Island doesn't interfere with the
salad dressing production totally different Island oh way more miles
involved it's a salad dressing joke guys
AMD is continuing Tech's proud tradition of just being the worst at naming things
AMD plans to take its Hawk Point laptop chips which launched as the ryzen 8040
series earlier this year and rebadged them as the ryzen 200 series according
to a webo post from a so far reliable leaker named Golden Pig upgrade this is
an especially perplexing move coming after AMD already launched the ryzen AI
300 series of laptop chips but I guess
having a product to confuse customers with just before Intel launches their
core 200 series processors is more important than adhering to Traditional
Values of sequential ISM speaking of fun branding Golden Pig upgrade also posted
details about AMD's upcoming high performance laptop chips code named
stricks Halo these will be branded as ryzen AI Max 300 so named because
they'll require one uranium Rod's worth of power each to turn on that's just
what it costs Qualcomm was reportedly considering the idea of acquiring
certain parts of Intel a couple weeks ago and according to the Wall Street
Journal Qualcomm actually approached Intel about a possible takeover the
balls on these guys I mean Intel's been in a rough spot but they've recently
laid out very specific plans for recovery and Qualcomm has been gunning
for Intel's spot in mainstream laptops it's kind of like having your teenage
brother ask you to be his twitch mod for a reasonable wage paid in Roo can I buy
milk with that in game Roblox
milk it's also kind of intrigued because the day before the journal's report
Qualcomm announced plans to lay off 226
workers in California in the coming months after laying off 1,200 less than
a year ago well how else I supposed to afford Pat do singer he takes a modest
salary he's a a million bajillion dollars he's a good man he looks like it
analysts speculate that the company's Snapdragon X Series Laptops
underperforming may have something to do with this meanwhile early impressions of
Intel's lunar Lake laptops indicate they match or exceed the performance and
battery life of qualcomm's competitors but Qualcomm wanted to shoot their shot
and hey game recognize game I probably
didn't use that correctly I don't even know what the game refers to he's a
rapper from California I do know who has real game
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at the link in the description they call me Riley the kid and I'm the quickest
bit in the west none of that was accurate they call you Riley the
rizzler Microsoft has launched the Windows app which is a Windows app that
runs Windows and Windows apps I promise
I'm not having a stroke the Windows app is likewise available for iOS macOS and
web browsers as a replacement for the Microsoft remote desk toop app much like
its predecessor the Windows app allows users to connect remotely to another
computer which is using Windows however it also includes the option of
connecting to a cloud-based Windows OS the app is currently in preview for
Android and you know what that means the Windows phone is back so not really
though you can pretend Apple has finally launched their apple intelligence
features to the public sort of the iOS 18.1 public beta is out but anyone can
download it if they want and use the features or at least the features that
are out now many of the features won't be here until 2025 but you can use the
ones that are out now as long as you have an iPhone 15 Pro or 15 Pro Max but
that didn't stop Apple Store Geniuses from chanting AI at the iPhone launch a
i a i in case you were wondering my
favorite replies to this tweet were am I an ult and just put the phone in the bag
man how excited are we I just want I just need a phone Sony is allegedly
making two separate system on chips for the PlayStation 6 generation leading to
some speculation that there might be a
handheld somewhere anyone the juice was
squeezed by renowned leaker Kepler L2
Kepler isn't sure if there will actually be a handheld or if it'll be an Xbox
series X slx2 console tier situation but
the leer believes one of them will be affordable speaking of unaffordable Sony
has announced a highly limited PS5 Pro
bundle featuring a PS1 colorway for the console's 30th anniversary and that's
actually available for the normal PS5 as well unlike the normal PS5 Pro this
bundle actually comes with a vertical stand and a matching $200 dual sense
Edge controller but still no disc drive
why because you Anker has put out a recall for three lithium ion power Banks
due to a manufacturing defect that may result in spontaneous combustion while
only a small number of these power Banks were affected uh batch manufactured
between January 3rd and September 17th of this year Anker also had to recall
another power bank and their A332
speaker phone back in June for similar fire related reasons so I guess the only
thing you can Bank on is explosions check our new sources for the specific
models and users are advised to put the Power Banks in a safe nonflammable
location and not to throw them away unless you've got some kind of grudge
against the garbage man the way he looks at me from the window or I'm in the
window what I hate him and science is
once again messing with forces it doesn't understand as researchers
discovered that light may be able to leave a cloud of atoms before it
actually entered said Cloud huh these
alleged scientists made a bunch of atams really cold and then shot them with
laser beams to excite them and I don't like how sexy that sounds but even worse
they found that when the laser light is at certain frequencies Atomic
excitations can occur before the light enters the atomic Cloud now apparently
this doesn't break any physical laws but that doesn't mean I like thinking about
it and not just because of all those sexed up atoms did you write this of
course you wrot it I expected a lot more about like the time breaking to time
space continuum no sexy jokes but you
know what would be sexiest of all if you come back on Monday for more Tech news I
won't bring it up again though we can just pretend that this whole
conversation didn't happen I'll just just okay don't make it weird