Here ye, here ye, the kingdom of TECH DOTH BRING NEWS MOST urgent from the
digital realm. The trebushchets ARE LOADED. THE ZUCKERBERG APPROACHES. LOOSE
THE NEWS. 23 major news outlets are
blocking the internet archives incredibly useful way back machine from
crawling their sites because, you know, we cannot in fact have nice things
anymore. USA Today just recently used the Wayback Machine to call out ICE for
altering detention stats and then immediately blocked the archival tool
from crawling their own site, which is frankly just rude. The news outlets say
this is necessary to stop AI crawlers from treating their sites like an all
you can scrape buffet. But not all of them are blocking Wayback's crawler. The
Guardians director of business affairs said that the Wayback Machine's API is a
real AI risk, so they are only going to be blocking that. So maybe don't attack
them on social media. Wayback's director Mark Graham responded, calling those AI
fears unfounded and restating how much effort they put into preventing possible
abuses of the crawler. Groups like Fight for the Future and Electronic Frontier
Foundation are rallying journalists to publicly back the archive, and over 100
of them have signed a letter thanking the Internet Archive and the Way Back
Machine for being an essential and critical tool. In other words, uh please
don't die. We kind of need you to fact check our bosses, please. Google,
Microsoft, and Meta are all tracking users even when they opt out of cookies.
According to an independent privacy audit, Web X-Ray, a privacy focused
search engine, which is founded by a former Google privacy engineer, scanned
over 7,000 popular California websites,
finding that 55% did set ad cookies even after users
clicked reject. Big tech isn't respecting people's privacy. No way.
According to the report, Google, Microsoft, and Meta failed to honor the
opt outs 86, 50, and 69% of the time,
respectively. Nice. Sorry, the number, not the situation. Unsurprisingly, all
three companies disputed the findings with Google calling it a fundamental
misunderstanding of the technology with Microsoft complaining that a rejection
of all cookies would cause some websites to break. According to Web X-Ray's
founder, the three companies have paid billions in privacy related fines
already, but that they see these payments as part of a cost of doing
business. You know what they say, you can't make an omelette without breaking
a a few billion eggs. The FCC just granted Netgear a conditional exemption
from the US ban on importing new models of foreign routers, making it the only
company currently allowed to import and sell foreignade consumer routers.
Neither the FCC nor Netgear have explained why this special privilege has
been granted. The only possible explanation, Netgear is FCC Chair
Brendan Carr's illegitimate son. Or maybe they just bought a load of Trump
phones. The whole thing is genuinely baffling, especially since the FCC's
original justification for the ban was the Volt Typhoon hack, which primarily
targeted Cisco and guess what? Netgear routers. Even weirder, the FCC's
approval process for the exemption requires a detailed plan to expand US
manufacturing, which Netgear hasn't
publicly committed to do. Critics are also quick to flag that the approval
process asks zero questions about router security, with the focus being entirely
on where the routers are made, which for the vast majority of consumer routers is
not in the US. Until other brands secure their own exemptions, Netgear is going
to be living a very privileged life. That illegitimate Sun's theory sounding
a little less crazy now, eh? You know what's not crazy? Our sponsor,
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I'm gonna do a Batman thing.
And low, in our hour of greatest need, cometh our salvation. Dominion in
stature yet vicious. RELEASE THE QUICK BITS. Windows Recall is facing fresh
security issues raised by researcher Alexander Heg. Oh, wow. I'm going to
butcher that name. Alexander H, whose work contributed to Microsoft delaying
the original version of the feature. H's tool Total Recall Reloaded, demonstrates
how malware can ride along with Windows
Recall, getting a free pass to the PC's entire history, which is precisely the
scenario Microsoft's architecture should restrict. Despite Alexander submitting a
full report to Microsoft, they denied that it was an issue, saying that it
falls within the current documented security design. I guess that means it's
not a bug, but a feature if they put it in the manual, right? Uh, really makes
me recall why Windows gives me the ick.
See what I did there? China has just tested a device that can cut undersea
cables at a depth of 3,500 m, hailing it as a breakthrough in
pipeline repair and causing other governments to flip out. The
announcement comes amidst global tension around a string of suspected sabotage
incidents in which undersea cables carrying the world's internet
communications were severed. This prompted NATO to patrol the waters near
these cables to protect them. So, you better torrent your anime now, boys, if
you ever want to find out if Princess Monoke finally gets her
glass slippers back. Snap CEO Evan
Spiegel announced plans to lay off 1,000
employees, which is 16% of the workforce
because AI has the capability of being the company's hardest working intern.
Spiegel says AI productivity gains will let smaller teams reduce repetitive work
and increase velocity, which tracks since Snapchat's product roadmap has
historically been 90% new filters and 10% wondering if anyone asked for them.
NVIDIA paid out almost 900 million in
warranty claims last year. That is 10 times more than the previous year thanks
to the 16pin power connectors continuing to melt themselves into modern art. Look
what they did to my boy. There is actually a silver lining in all of this
though. At least one Taiwanese RTX490
owner was able to prevent a potential houseire last week. It was after his cat
started screaming when it smelled rayraced fumes.
I guess the most reliable thermal monitoring tool in 2026 might in fact be
a cat. And Chinese automaker Sarah was
just granted a patent for an invehicle
toilet. The good news is the toilet seat is not permanently fixed and can be
hidden under the seat. Otherwise, your butt would get all, you know, sloshy and
no one wants that. Hopefully, the creator of the motorized toilet has had
his invention patented. Otherwise, there's going to be a serious legal
battle. I for one am on the side of THE MOTORIZED TOILET. I WILL NOT STAND for
big auto monopolizing the mobile bowel movement. That's just ridiculous. Ah,
the siege is over. The kingdom of tech has fallen. But take heart, for now we
rebuild. Two days hence, on the 17th of
April, we shall gather arms once more and RAIN TECH NEWS UPON THE HEADS OF OUR
ENEMIES. This metaphor needs more work, but you kind of